When Forever Ends
by erica scriven
Summary: Jasper succeeds in biting Bella on her birthday. Edward is forced to try to suck the venom out again, but finds it more difficult the second time around...
1. September 13

**When Forever Ends **

Based on the book _New Moon_, written and owned by Stephanie Meyer.

**What happens when Jasper succeeds in biting Bella on her birthday?**

**Can Edward suck the venom out a second time?**

**Or will his vampire instincts get the better of him…**

**Chapter 2 coming soon!**

**September 13 **

**~ Bella ~**

"Happy birthday!" Alice screamed in her high soprano voice, loud enough for anyone within a 12 mile radius to hear. Today was September 13, ugh, I hate birthdays.

"Bella?" Alice released me from her vice-grip and looked at me with an annoyed face. "What is your problem?"

"You know how I feel about getting older." I sulked. Alice rolled her eyes and turned to glare at the reason, Edward, who was standing beside me. "Whatever Bella, you're only 18, so get over it."

"_Only_ 18?" I choked out. "Edward is forever 17 and I'm 18, soon to be 30, soon to be 50, soon to be-" Alice interrupted my rant.

"Stop! You're 18. Not 30 or 50, not yet anyways…" My jaw dropped at the thought.

"Alice, please," Edward said to his always-excited-for-the-wrong-reasons-sister.

"Okay fine! Bella you are _so_ weird!" Alice folded her arms. "I will stop talking about it today while at school," I dramatically rolled my eyes at her. "But- tonight you _will_ be coming over for a proper birthday celebration."

"Alice! No!" I know that Alice doesn't kill humans, but I was starting to think that she was a different kind of evil altogether.

"Listen, Esme is already _really_ excited about having a real birthday party… but, if you would like to disappoint her, shatter her heart actually, then go ahead, break the news to her." Alice shoved her cell phone into my chest and smiled.

"Forget it, I'll go Alice." I knew that in the end I would never win against the painfully persistent Alice. She had all the time in the world. "What time?" I said in an emotionless tone.

"Alice, enough." Edward took his sister's cell phone and threw it in the garbage can beside him. "Could you ease up, please? If Bella doesn't want a party, then she doesn't have to have one. Esme only wants what Bella would want."

"No, no," I started. "I'll go, it's been a while since I've seen Esme anyway, I miss her." I sighed, I really didn't want a celebration but, I guess it couldn't hurt.

Alice closed her eyes and concentrated intensely for a few seconds. "Yes! You're coming! Thank you Bella! You'll love it, I promise!" Alice hugged me so tightly I thought my lungs were going to pop.

"Ow, um, Alice, OW," I managed to get out.

"Oh, sorry Bells!" Alice quickly released me and I fell into Edward's waiting arms. He sympathetically squeezed my shoulders.

"All right, you got want you wanted, now can you leave us alone?" Edward said while shaking his head. His beautiful bronze tousled hair swayed back and forth. I wished we were alone, I loved playing with his hair while kissing him…

"Yeah, I gotta go set-up anyways. I'll see you later Bella! Happy- err, bye!" Alice yelled back to us as she sprinted away.

"You know Bella, love, you don't have to worry about hurting Esme's feelings, or Alice's, they would completely understand if you really didn't want to go." Edward said as he unleashed a gorgeous smile my way. Wait, why was I upset again?

"I'm pretty sure that if I didn't go you would have to protect me from Alice, I'm pretty sure she'd want to kill me, or at least torture me. So, unless you're not opposed to fighting your sister," I joked, I really didn't care about the dumb party anymore. I didn't want to think about it any longer, I just wanted to focus on Edward's perfect face.

"Hmm, I'll ask Alice what the outcome would be, then I'll get back to you." Edward laughed and then kissed me on the cheek. "Well, I think we're going to be late for class, we should get moving."

I sighed, but class actually sounded like a good escape from all this birthday crap. I hoped, for my own sanity, that Alice didn't go all-out with the party. But I couldn't even pretend to believe that, I knew it was going to be ridiculous.

***

Despite my best efforts at hiding the fact that it was my birthday, everyone I seen greeted me with a great big _happy birthday! _I figured I had Alice to thank for this, she screamed happy birthday this morning so loud in front of the school, I think every single Forks' resident heard her.

I was happily holding Edward's hand, walking toward his Volvo in the middle of the school parking lot, when suddenly I heard a low snarl come from Edward's chest. "What's wrong?" I asked Edward quickly, scanning my surroundings, looking for any deranged vampires. Then I saw Mike, running toward me with a colourful piece of paper in his hand.

"Bella," Mike said out of breath, hands on his knees for support. "Sorry, give me, a second, to, catch my breath," The look on Edward's face was not a happy one. I was confused, what would cause Edward to be so upset with Mike? I looked away from Edward's fierce face, to examine the colourful paper Mike was holding, -oh.

"Okay, I'm good now! Sorry about that, but I didn't want to miss you, you know receiving birthday cards after your birthday is never fun." Mike was smiling huge at me, totally ignoring Edward. "This is for you, I made it." He handed me his homemade birthday card.

"Oh, wow, Mike, you shouldn't have, _really_, you shouldn't have." I added a smile after I realized I sounded a little too rude for the situation. It was a nice gesture, I guess.

"I know, I wanted to though Bella, do you like it?" Mike started to bite his lip.

"Lets see," I said as I took a quick look at the cover, it was a collage of tropical sunsets, palm trees, coconuts. All seemingly printed off of his home computer and glued to a piece of bright purple construction paper.

The front read: **Happy Birthday Bella! **

I quickly flipped the card open and there were more sunsets and coconuts.

In the middle of the right hand side it read:

**To Bella, I hope your birthday is just as amazing as you are. **

**-Mike**

I guess he was over being subtle, I noticed Edward stop breathing.

"Because I know how much you hate the cold, and the wet, so I wanted to put pictures of things you did like." Mike pointed to a palm tree that was glued to the inside of the card.

"Oh, right, I get it now. Thanks Mike, that's very, um, thoughtful." I said as I closed the card and smiled awkwardly at him. I could see Edward still glaring at Mike from the corner of my eye, but at least he was breathing again.

"Bella, we should get going, you mentioned in class that you wanted to watch Romeo and Juliet before your party." Edward said to me, still looking at Mike, who was still staring at me.

"Party?" Mike said confused, and hopeful.

"Private party." Edward corrected Mike with a taunting grin.

"Yes, we should go, thanks again Mike, see you later." I said while Edward grabbed my hand and led me towards his car.

"See ya," Mike said as he glared at Edward and turned to walk in the opposite direction.

The two of us walked in silence the rest of the way to the car. Edward opened my door and I slipped onto the black leather passenger seat. I couldn't help but feel somewhat sorry for Mike. It was rather sad that he was still trying so hard. I was so obviously with Edward.

"I may have to rethink my lifestyle, that kid is driving me crazy." Edward slammed his door shut. "When the hell will he get it? I have been nice up until now. That's it."

I started to laugh.

"This amuses you?" Edward said with a confused look, a gorgeous look.

"Yes, it _is_ a bit of a joke really. Me and Mike?" I burst into giggles again.

"Trust me, it's not a joke to him. He's quite serious about winning you over." Edward started shaking his head and turned the car on.

"And I'm quite serious about how much I love you, you don't even realize the hold you have on me Edward. I'm yours, forever." When I said forever, I literally meant, _forever_. Even though I knew Edward wasn't on the same page as me when it came to changing me into a vampire. He was one hundred percent against it actually, and I was one hundred percent for it, which made it a difficult subject to talk about.

But, instead of arguing about _forever _and the different meanings it had, Edward just ran his cool fingers through my hair and leaned over to kiss me hard on the lips. "I love you too my beautiful Bella."

***

While we were watching Romeo and Juliet Edward held me in his strong arms. I felt so safe, it was hard to concentrate on the movie.

"Romeo, oh Romeo," Edward said with a dramatic sigh during the final scene in the movie.

"What's wrong with Romeo?" I said defensively, I loved Romeo.

"He just always screws things up, that's all. Like look how things ended, horrible." He said with a loud chuckle.

"Leave him alone."

"I'm sorry, I won't interrupt again." Edward locked his lips and threw away the key.

"Well that's true, because the movie's over now." I said, sticking out my tongue.

"How ironic!" Edward said as he picked me up by the waist and sat me beside him on the couch. Ah, Charlie must be home. Charlie liked Edward, but I wouldn't want to overwhelm him with too much body contact. Holding hands was probably enough for him to take.

"Bella! Happy birthday!" Charlie shouted as the door slammed behind him. I got up off of the couch and met him in the hallway. He gave me a big hug and kiss.

"Thanks, again, Dad." He had already said happy birthday to me before I left for school.

"So, what are the plans for tonight? Want to go out? Order in? You pick kiddo!" He was now hanging up his police jacket and gun holster.

"Actually, Dad, Alice is having a birthday party for me at the Cullen's. You are welcome to come if you want." I asked out of politeness, but I already knew the answer.

"Um, no thanks Bells, there's a game on tonight I was hoping to catch. I think Billy's going to come up, if that's okay?" Charlie hated parties just as much as I did.

"No, that's fine Dad, have a good night, I'll be home later on." I said as I kissed him on the cheek again.

"All right then, have fun! Say hello to everyone for me." Charlie walked Edward and me to the front door. "Oh, wait!" he ran to the kitchen and back to us. "Don't forget this," he said while handing out my new camera he bought me. My mom had bought me a scrapbook. She wanted me to document my life in Forks, and send it to her.

"Oh yeah, of course." I said as I took my present from his hand. I decided I better make sure it worked, so I took a quick picture of Edward. "Just checking."

"Looks like it works!" Charlie said with a chuckle. "Bye!"

"Bye Charlie, have a pleasant evening." Edward politely said as we walked out of my front door.

***

"You're brave and completely selfless for doing this Bella." Edward said to me as we were pulling up to the giant Cullen house. There were flowers and twinkle lights everywhere. Alice.

I sighed and got out of the Volvo. Edward was by my side in the next second. He grabbed my hand and we slowly climbed the stairs, which were covered in rose pedals, to the front door, which was covered in twinkle lights.

"No need to be scared Bella." Edward said as he squeezed my hand and opened the front door.


	2. I Want This

**Chapter 3 coming soon!**

**I Want This**

**~Bella~**

I took a long, deep breath and walked through the Cullen's elaborately decorated front door. It was, in one word, ridiculous. Alice had gone _way_ over the top. There were candles and flowers everywhere. Including what seemed to be miles of twinkle lights wrapped around everything possible –table legs, chairs, banisters, -everything. I followed a rose pedal pathway that was laid out in front of me, it lead the way to the living room. "Oh boy." I whispered to myself.

"No, oh _girl_!" Alice appeared out of thin air with a brilliant smile, she had a basket of rose pedals and was throwing them everywhere. It was ironic how many hit me in the face.

"Well, Alice, you really out did yourself. But I have to admit, it looks beautiful." Edward said as he plucked a rose from a massive crystal vase and handed it to me.

"Thanks." I said and smelled the red rose, I closed my eyes and exhaled, "Mmmmm,"

"It's not even that great of a decoration job, there's only candles, a few flowers and some lights. Esme thought that what I _really_ wanted to do was unnecessary." Alice said with a frown.

"Thanks Esme!" I said relieved. Esme winked back at me. Then I seen something truly frightening- a cake, four tiers, sitting on a table behind Esme. "What. Is. That?" I snapped at Alice.

"Um, it's a birthday cake Bella, haven't you ever seen one before? Each candle signifies a year in your life, that's why your cake has 18! Cool huh?" Alice said sarcastically.

"Why did you need such a humongous cake when I'm the only one who can eat it?" I paused and thought of the one possible option, "Unless of course, it's made out of animal blood."

"Don't be gross Bella." Alice said annoyed. She shook her head and grabbed a box with shiny pink paper on it –no! _NO_ presents! I said I didn't want any presents. UGH, does anyone ever listen to me? Ever? I glared at Alice, about to remind her about my no-presents strict order.

"Don't." Alice warned with a frightening glare, so I didn't.

"I'll be right back," Emmett said with a chuckle to me. "Don't do anything funny while I'm gone."

"I'll try not to, thanks Emmett." He laughed as he vanished into the background.

"All right Bella, go ahead, open it!" Esme said, excitement overwhelming her. Alice was right, who knows how long it has been since they have celebrated an actual birthday. (A date in which you are officially a year _older_.)

"Oh, Bella, you forgot your new camera in my car, I'm sure Renee would be disappointed if you didn't get a couple shots on your birthday." Edward said as he headed toward the front door.

"Okay, I'll wait for you." I hollered in his direction.

"No, it's okay just open that one, there will be many other opportunities to take pictures." He said with a wink. Great, more presents. I told Edward not to spend any money on me, even though he has more than I could ever imagine. I already thought I didn't deserve to have Edward, no need to further throw off our balance.

"Hurry up!" Alice screamed with excitement and let go of Jasper's hand to come stand beside me. Jasper still lingered in the back, always being cautious. Rosalie, Esme and Carlisle were on the opposite side of the room, looking on with excitement. Well, maybe Rosalie wasn't that excited, but she wasn't being nasty either, I guess that's the most I could ask for.

The box felt light in my hand, especially for the size. It wasn't that big, about the size of a small shoebox, but it felt like there wasn't anything in it. My mind searched for what it could be as I tore the side of the wrapping paper. Unsurprisingly –I gave myself a paper cut. I felt myself fly backwards and hit something hard. Then my wrist caught fire.

I heard someone scream Edward's name, Esme maybe.

All this pain from one tiny paper cut? Something wasn't right, I couldn't see straight, my whole body was throbbing. I wondered why my wrist had suddenly been set on fire. What was happening to me?

"Edward! Bella cut herself, and Jasper attacked her, I, I didn't see that coming, I, I, I don't know what to do. I'm so sorry..." Jasper did this to me? But why, I guess I over estimated Jasper's self control. It was my fault anyways, I'm the one who cut myself. I hope Jasper doesn't feel too horrible.

"He bit her Edward, she's also losing a lot of blood from the huge gash on her other arm." I heard Carlisle's calm voice. "I need to attend to the arm, and you need to decide, again."

Jasper bit me. I was changing. _This is what I want_ I told myself. It was hard to remember that because I was in so much excruciating pain. My wrist felt like someone was stabbing it and submerging it into a volcano at the same time. It felt like I was lying on the ballet studio floor again. _But this is what I want, I want to become a vampire, I want to be with Edward forever. Please Edward! Let me change! _I wanted to scream it at him, but I couldn't find my voice.

"You've done it before son, believe in yourself." Carlisle calmly reminded Edward.

The pain in my wrist doubled, and I managed to find my voice to let out a scream. The pain was unreal, I had never experienced anything like this, I couldn't take it. With a sudden burst of adrenaline I opened my eyes long enough to see Edward with his mouth to my wrist, sucking out the venom. "No," I managed to whisper, but he didn't listen to me. The pain started to lessen. The fiery pain was gone, but I could still feel pressure on my wrist. I found myself becoming tired, wanting to fall asleep, to rest my eyes, just for a minute…

"Enough Edward. Her blood is clean, there is no venom left. If you don't stop, you will kill her." Carlisle's voice wasn't as calm as before. This alarmed me. Carlisle was never anything _but_ calm.

"Edward!" I heard who I think was Alice. "Rosalie, Esme, help me get him off. He's not going to stop. I see him killing her. But I know that he truly doesn't want this to happen, you both know that he would regret killing her later." Edward was killing me? No, he was just making sure my blood had no venom left in it. I didn't have the energy to contemplate any further; I drifted into a deep sleep. _I love you Edward, I'm sorry._


	3. Tearless Sobs

**Chapter 4 coming soon!!**

**Tearless Sobs**

**~Edward~**

"You've done it before son, believe in yourself." Carlisle said to me while Bella was thrashing around in severe pain next to me. He truly did believe in me, he was mentally replaying the last time I had to make this decision, how I was able to stop, and how proud of me he was.

Carlisle's version of what happened in the ballet studio was flattering, but not deserved. He seen me as a hero of sorts, being able to control my blood lust for Bella. I didn't deserve that admiration, not anymore at least. His kind memory brought back my own memory of that night, a more satisfying recollection. Bella's sweet, warm blood gushing down my cold throat. My vampire desires had up until that moment never been so completely pleased before, because Bella's blood was like no other to me.

But I did stop before. Could I really do it again? I wasn't sure. All I knew was that if I didn't try, Bella would lose her soul, and become a damned vampire like the rest of us. I had to try, I did it before, Carlisle believed in me.

I picked up Bella's right arm, ironically the same wrist that James had bit, and put it to my mouth, for the second time. Although I wasn't breathing, I could still smell her blood, I could already taste it on my tongue, I could already feel it flowing hot down my throat. That compete feeling of contentment was in sight, I was holding it in my cold dead hands.

I closed my eyes and let my lips make contact with her blood soaked wrist. Bella's succulent blood sent waves of pleasure throughout my entire body. My perfect memory of the taste failed in comparison to the real flavour. It was overwhelming me, I tried to remember that I had to stop soon, but the part of me that wanted to stop was dwindling, quickly.

"No," I heard Bella softly whisper to me. Although I couldn't read her mind, I knew that she meant that she wanted to become a vampire. Why would she ever want to become like this? I was thirsty for her blood, I wanted to suck her until nothing came out. She didn't want to be like me, I would never let that happen. I had to suck all the venom out; I needed to keep sucking her blood.

"Enough Edward. Her blood is clean, there is no venom left. If you don't stop, you will kill her." I barely heard Carlisle warn. _There's still venom, I can still taste it. _I lied to myself, a made-up excuse to let myself keep going, to keep sucking, harder. Her blood flowed so easily, it felt like I had found myself; my reason for existence. I couldn't stop I realized, and I was okay with not stopping. At least Bella would go to Heaven, at least her soul would not be taken from her. Was I actually telling myself why it was a good idea to kill her?

I heard Alice ask Rosalie and Esme to help her stop me. A territorial growl rose automatically out of my chest. Alice wouldn't dare. "Edward! Stop!" I heard Alice scream from behind me. I guess I really was going to kill Bella, Alice must have seen me sucking every last delicious drop. "You're killing Bella, _your_ Bella Edward! You will never see her alive again if you do not stop _now_." As Alice was screaming she was remembering Bella. She was remembering the look on Bella's face before I saved her from getting crushed, of Bella tripping over her own two left feet, of Bella's face flushed red, of me and Bella at the prom, of Bella laying in the Phoenix hospital bed, of Bella's lullaby…

_My Bella_. I threw Bella's blood drenched arm down, and stood up in half a second. I couldn't say anything, my mouth just hung open, and a single drop of blood trickled down my chin. Bella lay lifeless on the ground. I couldn't hear her heart. I had killed her. The only one I've ever loved, the only one I'll ever love.

Alice and Rosalie grabbed me and threw me out of the way. I knocked the table over that once held Bella's birthday cake, her last birthday cake. Esme picked up Bella's limp body and raced up the stairs. We followed. "Maybe you should take off Edward," Rosalie said, "Go cool off with Jasper and Emmett outside." I shook my head and ran past her up the stairs.

"Carlisle, are you ready?" Alice said frantically. Bella was laying limp on a spare bed that had been brought into Carlisle's office. Alice was beating Bella's chest and giving her mouth-to-mouth resuscitation. "Come on Bella! Stay with me! Don't leave me! Dammit Bella!"

"Yes, bring her over I've got everything set up. Quickly now!" Carlisle's tone sounded abnormal; it sounded worried. She wasn't going to live. There was no blood left in her fragile human body. I had killed Bella, and I had disappointed Carlisle, and the rest of my family.

Carlisle poked a needle into Bella that was connected to a bag full of O Negative blood. I was unbelievably thankful Carlisle always kept human blood on reserve, and I was incredibly thankful Alice was able to stop me. And Bella had me to thank for taking her life.

"Carlisle?" Esme said softly from the corner of the room, she was crying, well crying for vampire; tearless sobs.

"She has a pulse," Carlisle said to my disbelief. Bella was alive? I listened closely, and I heard her laboured heart beating sporadically. "Only time will tell, how much damage was done, to the organs, to the brain," Carlisle looked at me and I seen a glimmer of hope in his eyes, I seen hope in his thoughts.

"Thank you," I said and looked down from Carlisle's gaze, I was so ashamed of myself. What had I done? Why?

"You stopped." Carlisle said, "Edward, you stopped." I couldn't believe he was still defending me after such a disgusting display of selfishness and disregard for the one I claimed to love.

"I would've kept going if it wasn't for Alice," My voice trailed off. I looked over at Alice, who was kneeling beside Bella. She looked back at me and stood up.

"You did something that was extremely hard, for a second time Edward. No one thinks what you did was anything short of being a ridiculously tempted vampire. You _are_ a vampire Edward, and you _stopped_." Alice squeezed my shoulder as she spoke again, "I'm going outside to see what Jasper is doing, I imagine he feels terrible."

I let out a tense chuckle, he feels terrible? Jasper is new to this life of only animal blood, I am not. I shouldn't be allowed to continue living, or whatever it was that I was doing. I've never felt as dead as I do right now. I shook my head and sat in an arm chair that was beside Bella's bed. I leaned down to whisper in her ear, "I love you Bella, I'm sorry."


	4. I Remember

**Chapter 5 coming soon!!**

**I Remember**

**~Bella~**

I was standing in the middle of a flat field, tall green grass as far as I could see. The bright sun was high in the clear blue sky, scorching hot rays were beating down on me. I had no idea where I was, I looked around for Edward but he wasn't there, I was all alone. I didn't know why but I felt scared, the silence was eerie. I tried to run but I couldn't make my feet move, I was glued to the ground. Panicked, I tried to scream, but my lips wouldn't move.

I heard Edward's voice calling my name in the distance, "Bella, can you hear me Bella?" I tried to answer him but I couldn't, I was frozen. I looked around but I couldn't see where he was, I was still alone. "Bella?" His perfect voice called out to me again. I desperately tried to respond, but nothing escaped my lips. "I love you Bella."

"Edward!" I screamed as my eyes flew open. I seen Edward sitting next to me and I realized it was just a nightmare, I quietly sighed in relief.

"I'm here, Bella. I'm right here sweetheart." Edward held my right hand in both of his cold hands.

"What happened?" I asked him as I tried to sit up, but it was impossible because I was attached to a bunch of cords that hurt when I moved. I looked around and seen monitors with flashing lights, framed flower pictures, grey walls -I must be in the Forks hospital. I've been there enough to know.

"Please just relax, stay still." Edward whispered to me in between kissing my cheek. "I was so worried Bella, you lost a lot of blood, Carlisle wasn't sure if you would even regain consciousness." He stopped kissing me and looked down at my wrist, which was bandaged up.

"Jasper," I whispered as a flood of memories came back to me. I felt a feeling of severe disappointment wash over me, I could feel my eyes starting to fill with water. Why didn't Edward want me to become a vampire? I tasted the salty tears that were flowing steadily down the cheek that Edward was just kissing.

"I'm so sorry Bella, you have every right to be angry with me, to never want to see me again. I almost took your life, maybe it _would_ be better if you never wanted to see me again." Edward let go of my hand and replaced it with his head.

"What the hell are you talking about?" I yelled at him. "I'm upset because I wish you just let me change!"

"Bella!" He said as he looked up at me. His expression turned as angry as mine. "Don't be ridiculous, that is absolutely absurd, that will never happen, I will _never_ let that happen to you."

His words stung more than being bitten by a vampire a million times. I turned my head to face the other way as more tears started rolling down my cheeks.

He grabbed my hand again and spoke softly, "You don't want to be like me Bella, I couldn't stop sucking your blood," I turned back to look at him. "I wanted to keep going until you were dead… why would you want to become a monster like I am?" Edward shook his head and stared out the window.

"Then how am I alive?" I shouted angrily at him.

"Well, I did stop, but only because Alice made me. If she wasn't there, if I had continued for 10 more seconds…" He trailed off.

"It's only expected that you would have trouble with stopping." I started, "My blood is like heroine to a drug addict to you, you said so yourself!"

"Bella," He took in a deep breath. I waited for him to speak but he didn't say anything.

"Yes?" I said as I tried to look into his eyes, but he was still staring out the small window.

"Never mind, now is not the time, you need to rest." Edward looked at me again. He smiled at me and kissed my bandaged wrist gently. I was about to ask what he was he was talking about but Carlisle walked in the room.

"Good morning Bella!" Carlisle said with a smile. "How do you feel?" He said as he checked all the monitors I was hooked up to.

"I feel like I want to leave." I said back to him, "Please Carlisle?" I continued with a smile, "I feel fine." It wasn't a lie, but wasn't completely true. My wrist was stinging a little, but mostly my stomach felt uneasy from what Edward was saying. _Maybe it would be better if you never wanted to see me again. _He was blaming himself for everything -like usual.

"Well, that's good," Carlisle said with a chuckle. "You're quite the strong 18-year-old girl he said with a wink. Ugh, that's right, I was 18 now.

I exhaled dramatically, "So does that mean this 18-year-old can leave?"

"Not so fast," Carlisle held up his left hand to me. "How is your memory? Do you remember what happened last week?" I was unconscious for a week?

"Well, I remember opening the gift Alice gave me, and getting a paper cut," I paused, "And I remember being knocked to the ground, by Jasper, I guess." I looked down at my wrist, "I remember the pain of the venom, and I remember Edward sucking the venom out." I said with a frown.

"Good, that's good." Carlisle smiled. "All your tests have come back good, and you seem to be well enough to leave today."

Instant relief fell over me. Wait, what about Charlie? "Does Charlie know?" I looked over at Edward.

"Yes, well, he knows that you tripped over a flower pot and sliced your wrist open on a broken piece of the ceramic pot." Edward continued, "At first we set up a mock hospital room in Carlisle's office, you were there for two days. Charlie came over and spent a lot of time with you."

"But we needed to transport you to the hospital to do more tests." Carlisle chimed in. "Charlie has been visiting you everyday here as well."

"Renee?" I asked out loud.

"I told Charlie that it looked as if, remarkably, you were going to make a full and speedy recovery. He didn't think it was necessary to worry your mother." Carlisle's answer completely relieved me, Renee would have been a giant mess.

"I'll get a nurse in here to unhook you," Carlisle turned to look at Edward. "Now that you know Bella is perfectly fine, you should go hunt, you've had a rough week Edward."

"I agree with Carlisle, it's okay, go hunt." I said with a smile. Maybe after he hunts he would be in a better mood. Maybe he'll finally see what happened the way I did.

"After I get you home." Edward said flatly, then looked at me and forced a smile. On second thought, maybe it would take more than some animal blood to cheer him up. Whatever it took, I was prepared to do it, I couldn't stand to see Edward in pain, especially over me.


	5. Please Stay

**Sorry for the delay! Next chapter coming sooner!**

**Please Stay**

**~Bella~**

Silence. Edward was driving me home from the hospital, and there was absolute silence. Not one word had been uttered by either of us the entire car ride. I was beginning to panic, I hoped Edward would forgive me. I wanted to jump into his arms and tell him I was sorry and that everything was going to be fine. I wanted nothing more than to just hug and kiss him all over. Even though I was unconscious, I missed him. But the blank expression on his face advised me not to. I frowned when I realized that that would be the last thing he wanted. I wanted to speak, say something, anything -but I was too much of a coward, like usual.

_Say something! _I screamed at myself a minute later inside my head. Once again grateful that Edward couldn't hear my cowardly thoughts. I looked out the window and realized that we were almost at Charlie's house. I felt my heart race as I frantically searched for something to say that would make him stay the night with me, make him speak to me, make him hold me, kiss me…

"Thanks for the ride," I finally managed to whisper, immediately regretting what I had said. _Thanks for the ride?!_ What did that even mean? Stupid, stupid, stupid. I sighed.

"Bella," Edward began. I turned my head quickly to look at him. I was trying to look into his eyes, but he wouldn't look at me, he just looked blankly ahead at the road. "Are you okay?" he finished with little emotion in his beautiful voice.

"Yes, I am fine, great actually; being with you makes everything all right." I smiled and hoped that he would look into my eyes so he could see that I was telling him the truth.

Edward sighed and didn't bother to look at me at all. I bit my lower lip, butterflies were swirling around in my stomach. I searched for something else to say as Edward pulled his Volvo behind Charlie's cruiser, -which was a sign that he didn't plan to stay long. I felt a wave of panic come over me again.

"Can you please stay?" I said too fast, too loud.

Edward turned his head slowly and looked into my eyes, his face was intense now, his eyes examining mine. He looked back and forth from my eyes to the house. He was deciding what he wanted to do. He didn't want to stay.

"Actually, I had planned to go home. Maybe get Alice to go hunting with me." He said to me while flipping through radio stations. I felt hot tears roll down each of my pink cheeks. My jaw was trembling; I didn't want him to leave. I sniffed and Edward's head jerked to look at me.

"I thought you wanted me to hunt?" He said softly, some emotion managing to escape.

"Yes. No. Well, yes, but well I did, I mean I _do_, it's just that I also want you to stay…" I sounded like a drunk, I wasn't making any sense. Totally incoherent. "It's up to you," I said after a long pause. I felt like if he didn't stay the night I would happily fall down and die.

"Okay," Edward said with a hint of a smile. Such a beautiful smile, I felt so much better. Maybe he wasn't upset anymore, I hoped we could just forget about this whole mess and move on. "I'll go drop my car off and come right back."

My eyes widened and my body tensed.

"I'll come back very soon, you won't even get a chance to miss me." He joked but didn't understand just how much of a joke that was.

"Promise?" I asked.

"Bella," He said and kissed away the tears on my cheeks. "I love you," I felt my face flush and I reached out to hug him. He put his strong arms around me and held me close. He leaned away from me and looked into my eyes. I smiled at him and he unleashed a devastatingly gorgeous smile back. "Don't cry, my love, you'll be just fine." He placed his cold index finger under my chin and gently guided my lips to his. I was dazed, shocked and pleased by his sudden change in mood. The kiss lasted longer than usual. I wrapped my fingers in his hair, and he did the same to me, kissing me passionately. I reached down and undid my seatbelt, still kissing him. I stood on my left knee attempting to straddle him, when he pulled away.

"Hurry back," I said, out of breath.

"Yeah I'll try. Charlie wants to talk to you anyway." _Charlie_ I remembered, I was not looking forward to having to lie to my dad about my injuries –again.

"Ok," I said and went to grab the door handle, but before I could it swung open and he was there. He picked me up out of the seat and carried me to the front door, which was unlocked.

"Bella!" I heard Charlie scream from the living room. He ran quickly around the corner and hugged me gently. "I was so worried! You need to be more careful. You hear me? I'm serious, how do you always end up in these situations?" Even though I couldn't read his mind, I knew what Edward was thinking, _me_. I suddenly realized that he was never mad at me, he was blaming himself. It made perfect sense now, the way he was acting. I wished Charlie wasn't there so I could tell him that it wasn't his fault; he saved my life.

"Thanks, Edward." Charlie said as he grabbed the door handle. "Good night, send my regards to Carlisle and everyone."

"I will, good night," Edward said as he kissed the top of my head. He turned around and disappeared into the rain.

"Um, dad," I had to figure out a way to get away from Charlie, I just wanted to go to my room and wait for Edward. "I'm really tired, I'm going to go back to bed, school night."

"Bella, you don't have to go to school tomorrow, all your teachers know about your accident." I cringed, if my teachers knew than everyone knew. I would have to face everyone's laughs and giggles tomorrow. _That clumsy Bella, what an idiot._

"I feel fine, I'm just tired right now, I want to go tomorrow."

"Ok, well we'll play it by year, see how you feel in the morning." Charlie gave me another long hug and kissed my cheek. "Goodnight Bells, good to have you home."

"Thanks, night dad." I started up the stairs slowly. My body was stiff from laying in the hospital bed for so long. I heard my familiar bed calling my name and I moved more quickly.

I sat on my comfy bed and looked around my room. It felt like forever since I'd been there. I was reminded of my recent birthday by the stack of presents on my desk. Edward must have come by and put them here while I was in the hospital. All my unopened presents from my party were piled up neatly. I got up and walked over to my desk. On top of the pile was a card. I became extremely annoyed. It was the card Mike had made for me. It was placed carefully above all the other presents, I'm sure it was some kind of sick joke from Edward because I distinctly remember tossing it in the trash. I looked at the unopened presents and contemplated opening them before Edward got there. Just in case I got anymore paper cuts. There was really only one present that interested me at the moment –Edward's. I searched through the small pile and found the one with his handwriting. _For my Bella_ was written in silver on the dark blue wrapping paper. I opened it quickly –without cutting myself– and it was a CD jewel case. I opened the black case and there was a blank silver disc inside. I popped open my CD player, dropped the CD in carefully and pressed play.

I gasped when I heard what started to play through the speakers, it was my lullaby. Edward had recorded himself playing my lullaby on the piano. My eyes filled with tears and my mouth hurt from how wide I was smiling. It was the most thoughtful gift I'd ever gotten, it was perfect.

I would have to thank him a million times for the gift. I looked at my alarm clock and the numbers read 10:12. I decided to take a quick shower, I felt greasy and dusty from my miserable hospital stay. And I wouldn't want to be disgusting when he got here, I was hoping we could pick-up where we left off in his car…

I stepped out of the shower and felt a surge of excitement run through me as I thought about Edward sitting on my bed waiting for me. I started pulling my sweat pants over my still wet legs, and then my old t-shirt around my soaking wet head. I grabbed my toothbrush, put a dab of paste on and hurried to clean my neglected teeth. While I was frantically brushing I tried to dry my hair as best I could with my damp towel. I wasn't having much luck so I decided to wipe off the foggy mirror with the towel instead. I stared at my reflection in the mirror and noticed that I was smiling. I shook my head at myself and spit into the sink.

I practically ran out of the bathroom and into my room, "Hello-"I started before I realized he wasn't there. I looked at the clock, 10:34. He usually didn't take any longer than 10 minutes. I plopped on my bed and looked out my window. The rain had picked up.

10:46

10:59

11:30

_What the hell? _I said to myself, still sitting in the same position on my bed. Maybe he came when I was in the shower and decided to go back home. Maybe he was angry that I opened his present without him being there. _No_, I thought to myself, he probably thought I just needed to rest. I collapsed on my pillow and closed my eyes. I should just go to sleep and see him in the morning when he picks me up. _What if he doesn't?_ An evil voice said in the back of my head. I needed to see Edward, to tell him I wasn't mad at him, that it wasn't his fault, and if he wasn't going to come to me, I was going to go to him. I wasn't tired anymore and there's no way I could ever get back to sleep. _Crap. _I thought, if I started my truck Charlie would know I was leaving, I guess I'll have to walk.

I put on a long sleeve shirt, on top of that a sweatshirt and on top of that my heavy duty rain coat. I threw on a pair of jeans and two pairs of socks. My hair was still a bit wet but I didn't have time to dry it before leaving. I found a wool cap and tugged it around my messy damp head.

I very slowly and carefully opened my bedroom door and peaked outside. I couldn't see anything because it was pitch black. I could hear the raging wind and rain outside and for once I was thankful for the noisy weather. Charlie's door was half closed. I stopped and listened for what I wanted to hear: snoring. I heard it, and lots of it. Poor Charlie was probably exhausted from all the worrying. If he only knew what his clumsy daughter was up to tonight.

I went down the stairs –testing first for creaky spots–- very slowly. When I reached the door I listened again for Charlie's snores. Once I heard them I quickly put on my boots and unlocked the front door. The rain was annoying, blowing in every direction. Looked like I was having my second shower of the night. I started walking down the road in the direction of the Cullen house. I estimated that the journey would take me about an hour. Maybe less because I was so anxious to see him.

Once I got a rhythm going it really wasn't too bad at all. I had been walking for about 45 minutes and the rain had let up some. I knew the Cullen's long driveway was somewhere coming up but it was so dark out, and I could never spot it even during the day. A couple minutes later there was a clearing in the trees and I knew that I had found it. I started jogging down the long driveway towards the big white house.

I heard something move in the trees and I came to an abrupt stop. I looked in the direction of the noise but I couldn't see anything. _Probably just a deer. _I told myself and started running. I was looking for the bright porch lights but I couldn't see through the trees. I just saw black. I started to wonder how much further the house was, I didn't think the driveway was that long. Just as I thought that maybe I went the wrong way I ran into a clearing, leaving the trees behind me. I could now see the house, but there were no lights on. Strange considering every time I've been over the lights had been on, especially at night –they didn't sleep.

I walked toward the front door and made a mental note that there were no cars in the driveway. I climbed the few stairs to the door and seen an envelope taped to it. It was labeled in his elegant handwriting: _Bella_.


	6. Hate Me

**Thanks everyone for reading my story, **

**and those of you who leave reviews- they really make me smile! :)**

* * *

**Hate Me**

**~Bella~  
*********

I stared blankly at the plain white envelope with my name written on it, not sure what to make of it. I decided to knock, even though a voice in my head told me that it was obvious the house was vacant. I knocked again harder, _thump, thump, thump_. I placed my ear to the door and listened carefully for any sounds, I hoped to hear the sound of Emmett giggling in the background. I heard nothing. "Hello?" I said out loud, but barely loud enough for my own ears to hear.

I stared back at the white envelope. For some reason I didn't want to read it, even though it was pretty and inviting, with my name etched perfectly in black ink; but I feared what it might say. How long until Edward would be home? One hour? Four? Maybe he needed to hunt more than he'd let on. Stupid. I should've just stayed at home and waited for him to return like he said he would.

I turned around with a sigh and sat on the top porch step, looking out towards the dark lush forest. The roof over the porch shielded me from the rain, which was really more like a mist now. My foot started tapping anxiously and I nibbled on my lower lip. I resisted turning my head around to see the envelope. I would just wait until he came back, no point in reading the note and becoming more anxious when he would most likely be here soon anyways. I would just wait it out here. It wasn't _that_ cold out, and I was protected from the rain.

_But for how long? _That damn voice asked. I sighed again, –the annoying voice was right, I couldn't sit here all night, or however long his trip would last. –hopefully no longer than one night– Charlie would worry after I didn't come down in the morning. I'm sure he would check on me, and Charlie had been through enough over me lately. He would for sure ground me for life, or worse.

It was time to stop being so selfish and cowardly. I stood up and spun around on my left heel. _**Bella**_ stared back at me, taunting me. I shook my head and lunged for it. I carefully peeled the tape from the door, making sure no white paint came off with it. I flipped the envelope over and ripped it open with my pinky finger. I stuck my hand and found a piece of folded thin off-white paper with a message written on it in his beautiful script. The 'be-right-back' note looked more like a letter though; it was a lot longer than I had imagined it was going to be.

_**Dearest Bella,**_

_**Let me start off by saying how sorry I am, and that you have every reason and right to be upset with me –to hate me– and I hope you do. I'm sorry I didn't return when I had said I would. I'm sorry I made you come looking for me. I'm sorry for all the pain I've caused you, both emotionally and physically. And I'm sorry I wasn't the person you thought I was.**_

_**I am leaving, along with the rest of my family, for good. You will never see me again. I will **_**not **_**allow you to be in constant danger any longer. I have been too selfish Bella, I should have never came back to Biology last year, I regret ever talking to you, putting you in this horrible situation. This is all my fault and I want you to know that. Do not blame yourself Bella, blame me.**_

_**I never deserved your love, and you deserve so much more. Promise me to take care of yourself, and I will promise you that one day you will find true love, with someone who will never hurt you the way I have.**_

_**Goodbye Bella,**_

_**Edward**_

"No!" I screamed at the top of my lungs and threw the ridiculous letter to the ground. While pounding on the door I continued screaming, "Edward! Open. The. Door!" This was so not funny. Was this his idea of a joke? "EDWARD!" I screamed frantically, tears clouding my vision. "Please!" My hands started to throb from the beating I was inflicting on them, but it wasn't nearly as painful as the thought of Edward leaving me.

I wasn't sure how many minutes had gone by, but I stopped to listen. There were still no sounds coming from within the big house, I could only hear the noise of the forest around me. I looked down at my sore fists and realized they were shaking, along with the rest of my body. My trembling lips covered my chattering teeth and I cried out again, "Please Edward! Open the door! Don't leave me please! Please!" I jumped down the stairs from the porch to the wet driveway. The rain had stopped altogether now and I started to run towards the back of the house. I wasn't sure what I was doing but I thought maybe he was hiding somewhere, waiting for me to find him.

I found the French doors at the back of the house and I tried to open them but they were locked. "Alice?!" I shouted, trying to peer into the house, but I couldn't see anything. All the windows were covered with curtains, keeping me out. "Emmett, come on! This isn't funny anymore, just let me in please! You win!" I was frantic, I didn't understand why this was happening to me. I just wanted to see Edward, I wanted him to be here with me.

_He's not here. _I realized and let my arms fall to my sides and stopped yelling into the darkness. My legs gave out and I fell to the ground. I wasn't crying anymore, I was hardly breathing at all. I let the rest of my body give way and stared up at the sky. No stars were out tonight, it was too cloudy. I curled up into a ball on my side and stared blankly at the forest. I focused on the trees, their shape, size, height. I didn't want to think about what this meant. I didn't want to feel anymore. I closed my eyes and welcomed the rain that started to fall again on me.

I tried to fall asleep there, to drift away and forget it all. But I couldn't, the rain was beating down on me hard, and the wind was wild –I was freezing. My fingers started to feel numb and I honestly didn't mind. Maybe the rest of my body would become numb, and I could fall into a deep numb sleep. After a couple minutes I knew that wouldn't happen. I felt like I wouldn't be able to ever sleep again. I opened my eyes and stared back at the forest. It was still dark outside but dawn had to be closely approaching. He still wasn't back. He was _never_ coming back. He could be on the other side of the country by now. I would never see his angelic face again, I would never kiss his perfect cold lips. He would never sing me my lullaby. It was all over. Why was I so surprised? I had always questioned why he paid any attention to me at all. Maybe he finally woke up and realized I was nothing special. Nothing unique, nothing worth fighting for.

As I continued to stare off into the dark forest listing the reasons why Edward wouldn't want me, –klutzy, boring, plain…– I thought I saw something move quickly. I didn't flinch though, I wasn't scared. I sat up and kept looking, I saw it move again. I stood up and started walking towards the woods. What was I doing? No clue. As I was walking I could see the figure stop moving and stay still. The rain was still beating down but I could still see through the trees pretty good. I stepped through the leaves and there was nothing there. I was disappointed.

"EDWARD!?" I screamed into the woods. Maybe he was hiding out there, maybe he was hunting with Jasper and Alice, and Emmett and Rosalie. "ESME!" surely kind-hearted Esme wouldn't play such a cruel joke on me. Even though I was told that they were never coming back, I still called out for the Cullen's. I didn't know what else to do. It was too hard to believe, I'd rather tell myself lies than face the awful truth. Pathetic, I know.

I walked deeper into the dark woods, tripping over fallen branches and acquiring a nice collection of scrapes and gashes. It was like I was in a daze, I wasn't sure where I was headed but I just couldn't stop. If I stopped looking for Edward, he would disappear forever. "EDWARD!" I screamed, "I, I really love you, probably more than you know, so, please, Edward PLEASE, come back." I was running now, "Don't leave me all alone!" I continued to run even though my body begged me to stop. My lungs were on fire from the lack of breathing due to my screaming and violent crying. I eventually found a stump to rest on when I felt dizzy. But I couldn't catch my breath. My throat was swollen and I couldn't manage to get any air in; I started to hyperventilate. This had never happened to me before but I had seen it happen to people on TV. They usually needed a paper bag to get their breathing under control, too bad I was in the middle of a forest. It felt like I was drowning, but the only water was streaming from my swollen eyes. As I was gasping for breath something fell behind me. It startled me enough to snap me out of my fit. Like someone yelling "boo!" and your hiccups disappearing. I jumped off the stump and turned to see what the noise was. But just like before, nothing was there.

I know I heard something; it was so loud I almost felt it. Was I going insane already? Or had I always been this way, another reason to add to the list of flaws in my head. No, I definitely heard something, like a huge tree branch falling. But I searched the forest floor around me and there weren't any branches big enough to have caused the noise I heard. _Maybe a deer ran by _I told myself. The feeling of someone watching me came then, and I suddenly regretted running around randomly like a chicken with its head cut off. I looked around where I was. All I could see were trees, in every direction. Great. I was so completely lost, in every sense of the word. I thought seriously about giving up, but thought of Charlie again. _Ugh. _

I decided to at least attempt to find my way out, and if I couldn't, then hey I tried. Cause of Death: total idiot, generic unlovable idiot. I walked and walked. For what seemed like hours but I'm not sure how long it really was. I was still in a daze. Not thinking about much really. Maybe I was still in shock. After all, it was like someone had just died. Okay, not someone, but the one.

As I continued to walk I still felt like someone was watching me, but I wasn't scared. Honestly, I just didn't give a shit anymore. If someone found amusement in my idiocy then good for them. If someone wanted to kidnap me, rape me or kill me, then I guess that would suck. I chuckled to myself at the though. Perhaps I really was going crazy.

Finally, I found a road. Not sure where the road led, but at least it was a step in the right direction. Or maybe in the complete wrong direction. Whatever. I walked in what I thought would be the right way towards Charlie's. The sky was beginning to lighten up, but it was still pouring rain. My throat hurt and I probably had an pneumonia. I was thinking about if I should visit the doctors when it hit me. _Edward's gone._

**~Jacob~  
*****

I can't believe my Dad made me get up at 4:30am to drive him to his favourite fishing spot. Didn't he know I enjoyed sleep? Then after I dropped him off he asks me to go into Fork's to pick up some potatoes cause they're fifty cents off. Really? Like, are you serious? Well, I guess any excuse to drive, I just got my license so it's not too bad… but it's so early!

The sun was trying to shine through the clouds, but it wasn't having any luck. It had been raining since yesterday non-stop. My Dad is most definitely crazy to go fishing in the rain. Only a make-shift shack to shield him from Mother Nature. Crazy old man. It would probably be a pretty sweet sunrise if you could see it.

Trying not to nod-off I focused on the road ahead of me and seen someone walking on the left side. They didn't have an umbrella and were soaking wet. Maybe their car broke down or something. Wait, is that… "Bella?" I asked myself out loud. I slowed the truck down as I passed the person walking and got a good look. Yes, it most certainly was Bella Swan, I hadn't seen her since Prom, she was always with her boyfriend Edward.

I pulled my Dad's beat-up truck over to the side of the road and let it idle in the rain. I got out and ran towards Bella, getting instantly soaked. She looked like she'd just seen a ghost. "Bella! What are you doing out here?" I had to yell because the rain was so loud. She looked at me but didn't say anything. "Um, Bella, are you okay? C'mon get into my truck." I grabbed her hand and led her to the passenger side door and opened it for her. She just stood there, like she didn't know how to get into a vehicle. What the hell? Why was she out here anyways. "Bella! Get in!" I grabbed her by the waist and directed her into the seat, then I buckled her seat belt, and shut the door. The whole time she just stared blankly ahead. It was extremely creepy.

I ran around to my side and hopped in. Bella was soaking wet and shaking so I found an old dirty blanket amongst the filth in the back seat. "Here, it's really gross and smelly but it's better than nothing. You look like… you are cold." I draped the grungy blanket around her shoulders the best I could without her assistance. I wanted her to tell me what was wrong, I wanted to do something for her, but I didn't know what. "Bella," I stared, trying to get her to look at me, but she didn't, "What happened honey?"


	7. I'll Help You

***I had so much fun writing this chapter!***

**(Even though I am Team Edward)**

**Thanks for reading :)**

**

* * *

**

I'll Help You

**~Jacob~  
*********

My truck was making painful sounds from having been sitting idling for so long, so I turned the key and the engine cut off with a sudden and thankful_ thud_. It was the sound of the rain hitting the roof that now filled the truck cabin. Bella still hadn't said anything, she hadn't moved, I contemplated checking her pulse. I wasn't sure what to say, I had asked her what was wrong and what happened a million times with no reply. I was starting to think that whatever had happened wasn't up for discussion. So I had to try a different approach.

"Do you want me to take you home, or to Edward's house, or–" when I said _Edward_ Bella actually had a reaction, even though it was only a quiet gasp, it was huge considering this was her first sign of being alive. So, I knew this was probably the cause of whatever it was she was upset about. "Bella?" I pressed, hoping she would give me some sort of information or direction.

"Um, yeah Charlie's please." She said quietly, still not turning to look at me. I wondered if maybe they broke-up, but why would he make her walk home? Maybe there was some merit in my Dad hating the Cullen's.

"Did he hurt you?" I asked while I started the truck.

"Who? Oh, no. Just please Jacob, please I can't," Her quiet words trailed off.

"Okay, no problem. My lips are sealed, no more questions." I said with a forced smile. This girl looked horrible. I wanted her to grin at least, but she looked as if she didn't know how. I turned the heat up and drove down the road towards Charlie's place. I wondered what he was going to say about this, and I hoped that Bella was able to talk to _him_ at least. I also hoped that Charlie would shoot Edward with his rifle if he actually did make her walk home in the pouring rain…

Upon pulling up to the Swan residence it looked like Charlie had left for work early. He practically lived there, my Dad was always saying he worked _too damn hard_. I heard Bella gasp again, but this time louder.

"What's wrong?" I asked as I parked in front of the house and shut the truck off.

"I hope he didn't go looking for me, he didn't know I was gone." She said weakly, still sitting and staring ahead. It was as if she knew she should care, but she didn't have the energy to.

"Oh, well, I'll help you in, and we can call the station." I opened up my door and ran around to her side, yeah it was still raining. She didn't bother to open her door so I did for her. I was starting to wonder if something was seriously wrong with her. "Should I maybe take you to the hospital," I said as I was just about to unbuckle her seatbelt for her.

"No," She simply said.

"Oh, okay." What was I supposed to do? Drag her there? I'll let Charlie do that. I helped her out of the truck and with one hand around her waist led her to the front door. I tried the doorknob but it was locked. She pointed to the eaves trough by the door and I searched it and found a spare key. I stuck it in the lock and opened the door. She just stood there so I had to guide her with my hand back on her waist. With my hand still touching her I put the key back and went inside.

When Bella stepped inside she just stood still. "Is this the right house?" I joked.

"Um, yeah, thanks."

"Oh, that's good!" I said with too much fake enthusiasm. What the hell was I doing? I walked into the kitchen, looking around and thinking of what I should do next. Call Charlie? Go get my Dad? Leave her alone? My thoughts were interrupted by a note I seen laying on the kitchen table.

_**Bells­**_**–**

_**Went to work early. Didn't want to wake you. Call me at the station after you read this. **_

_**Love Dad**_

At least Bella didn't need to worry about explaining her whereabouts to Charlie. I walked back over to Bella who was in the same spot by the door and handed her the note. She quickly read it and walked over to the phone. "Hi Dad, I don't feel up to going to school today," she said quietly into the receiver. "Ok, thanks, bye Dad." She hung up the phone and looked over at me.

"Well, lets get you dry, no offense but you look and smell like a wet dog." I said as I quickly walked over to her and put her hand in mine. "Your room's up stairs right?" She nodded. I slowly led her up the stairs, the whole way contemplating carrying her; she looked too weak to walk.

Her bedroom was huge, at least compared to the closet I slept in. It was really nice actually, homey, comforting. "So, here you go Bella, so maybe you should take a shower or something before you go to bed?" I half-asked half-told. She walked over to her bed and sat down. "Um, Bella, you're soaking wet, you're going to get your nice sheets all dirty." She shrugged.

Was I going to have to bathe her? This was getting a bit out of hand. I wasn't sure I was the right person to be dealing with this. I hardly knew this girl. "Maybe, I should call Charlie, he could… help you… get ready for bed." She looked at me, eyes wide. "…Or, I don't know, I could I guess, if you want…" I really hoped she would tell me to screw off, but no, she just nodded her head.

"Oh, okay, um…" I'd never seen a girl naked before –well in real life anyway. "I will get you a towel, and close my eyes. I'll put lots of bubbles in the tub don't worry." I smiled at her, trying to make this completely fucked up situation as normal as possible. I turned around and went into the bathroom, searching for a towel –a big one. I found what looked like a beach towel at the bottom of the linen closet that I thought would work best. I threw it on the counter and kneeled down to look below the sink. I didn't see any bubble bath, which wasn't very shocking; Charlie didn't seem like the bubble bath type.

I _needed _bubbles. I left the bathroom and ran down the stairs, praying Charlie had dish soap at least. I ran into the kitchen and sighed with relief when I seen a half-empty bottle of lemon scented Dawn. I grabbed the sticky bottle and ran back up the stairs. When I passed Bella's room to enter the bathroom I noticed she was still sitting on her bed in the exact same position with the exact same expression on her face. I am in _so_ way over my head. I crammed the rubber plug into the hole in the tub and cranked the knobs to the left. I squeezed the lemon soap into the flowing hot water and instant bubbles were born –I squeezed again for good measure. While the tub was filling I stood in the bathroom wondering what the hell I was doing. I was pretty sure Charlie would shoot me if he came home during this… whatever _this_ was exactly.

Once the water reached the top of the tub I turned the taps off. The bubbles were a foot high off the top of the water, some were dripping down the side of the tub. I grabbed another towel from the closet and threw it on the floor. I snatched the beach towel, took a deep breath in, and went to get Bella.

"Hey, I found this towel, it's big." She looked at the ground and bit her lip. "Here, I'll hold it open and you can get undressed and then take it when you're ready. I won't peak, I promise. I closed my eyes and stretched the towel out in front of me.

A couple minutes had passed and I started to wonder if she had fallen asleep or something. "Bella, are you almost ready?"

"I don't think I need a bath actually. I think I'll just go to sleep now." I opened my eyes and saw her still sitting on her bed, fully clothed.

"Bella you need to get cleaned up, now lets go." I was getting impatient, she was wet and cold and why didn't she just get in the damn bathtub! "Come over here right now." I said firmly, and then added, "please" incase I offended her. She looked at me and I realized I was going to have to do everything myself. I had never been in love, but if that is what happens after it's over… I wasn't sure love was for me.

I walked over to her side and said softly, "I'll help you, we can do this together."

"Thank you." She said softly back.

"Can you lift your arms please?" I grabbed the bottom of her sweatshirt and pealed the wet thing off her body and over her head. "Next." I said and grabbed the bottom of her t-shirt that she had on under her sweater. She lifted her arms up and I pealed it off her, revealing a beautiful porcelain body. "All right, pants next." I wasn't going to remove the bra, yet.

Bella let her arms fall and I kneeled down, my head level with her waist. She was wearing jeans, _just do it_ I told myself. I quickly undid the top button with both hands, and pulled the zipper all the way down. I put my hands on either side of her waist, "Ready?" I asked and looked up at her. She nodded once back. I inserted my thumbs into the top of the jeans and pulled downward. I had to pull pretty hard because the jeans seemed like they were fused to her legs, which were pruned from being wet for so long. It looked pretty painful. When the jeans were at the floor Bella stepped out of them. She was now almost completely naked in front of me. But somehow I wasn't horny –I just felt really bad for her.

"All right Bella, I am going to close my eyes and then take off your under ware." I said and noticed she was shaking, "We're almost done." I said trying to comfort her. I placed my hands back on her waist and closed my eyes. Inserting my thumbs in again I pulled her panties down to her feet. She stepped out of them, and grabbed my shoulder for support. Once she was out of them I put my hands on her feet and lightly traced my fingers up the outside of her legs going quickly up her body until I felt her bra straps. I reached around her back and tried to undo her bra. I had never done this before, and I was having a bit of trouble with it. I must have looked like an inexperienced idiot. Finally the damn thing popped open. I traced my fingers up the straps on her back and took her bra off. There was now a beautiful and completely naked girl in front of me. But still, all I felt was sorry, so unbelievably sorry.

"All right," I said standing back up. I held out my hand, palm facing up. "Give me your hand Bella," I felt her cold hand in mine and I turned around. I opened my eyes and looked only forward. I slowly led her to the bathroom and stopped once I was at the tub. I closed my eyes again, "Okay get in," I said with a smile. Still holding my hand, Bella stepped into the warm bubbles.

"Okay, I'm in." She said still not letting go of my hand.

I opened my eyes and smiled; the bubbles covered her completely. Now what? "So, where's the shampoo?" I've gone this far, no use stopping now. Bella looked at the only bottle on the tub. "Oh, right." I sat on the side of the bathtub and picked up the green bottle. I squeezed some in my hand and looked back at her. "Do you think you could dunk your head for me please sweetie?" She plugged her nose and slid under the bubbles. A couple seconds later she reappeared. I leaned in closer, and started lathering the soap into her long brown hair. "Okay you'll need to dunk yourself again." I said after a couple seconds.

She nodded and went under again. This time my hands followed and I quickly rinsed her hair. After she came back out of the water I gave her a wash cloth with some soap on it. "Here, just quickly rub your body with this please." I was hoping I wouldn't have to do that. To my surprise she took the cloth and rubbed her arms with it, then the cloth went below the bubbles. I was genuinely impressed, maybe she was getting over whatever had happened now.

"Ok Bella, I think that's good. You can get out now." I remembered the beach towel was still in her room. "I just have to go get that towel, I'll be right back." I ran to get the towel and stood by the bathtub. Spreading it open like before, and closing my eyes. I heard her stand up and she put her wet hands on my shoulders again and stepped out of the tub. I wrapped the towel around her and opened my eyes. "I'll go get another towel to help." I found a smaller towel and started rubbing her arms and legs, and lastly her wet hair. "Okay, just about done. Where's your blow drier?"

"My room," She whispered.

"All right, lets go." I smiled at her and she held out her hand. When we got into her room again I saw the drier sitting on her desk. I tested the length of the cord and to my delight it reached the bed. "Okay sit here, and I'll blow dry your hair." She walked over to the bed and sat down like I had asked.

As I was brushing and blow drying her hair I thought about Bella. What happened to this poor girl? Will she ever be normal? What was Charlie going to do? What was I going to do? What did this mean for me? What did Bella think of me? Would she tell Charlie about all of this? Would Edward find out and kick my ass?

I realized her hair was dry and I quickly shut the drier off. "All done, now let me find you something to wear." I seen a pair of already worn pajamas on her bed and decided they would be fine. "Ok that was quick," I said with a smile. "Do you think you could put these on yourself, or do you need help?" I said gently.

"Help." Bella whispered back.

I grabbed the old t-shirt and put it over her warm head. I pulled her raised arms through the shirt and pulled the shirt over the towel. "Oh right, um, you'll need panties," I said, feeling my face go red.

"Top drawer." Bella instructed and pointed to a dresser on the other side of the room.

"Of course," I answered and went to the wooden dresser. I opened the drawer and stuck my hand in and grabbed the first pair I touched. I went back to Bella and kneeled by the bed. I was getting the hang of this now. I closed my eyes and said, "Step in." and she did. I pulled the white panties up her legs until they were snug around her butt. I opened my eyes and stood back up. I grabbed the flannel pants off the bed and held them open the same way. Once she had them on she sat back down on her bed.

I sat down beside her, searching for the right words. I watched as Bella placed her head in her hands and started to cry. "Bella, I'm not sure why you're upset… but I'm so sorry that you are." I said, and wrapped my right arm around her shoulders. She surprised me by latching onto my chest. Hugging me so hard I could barely breathe. She was crying into me, and I was holding her securely, rubbing her back. I didn't say anything more. I simply listened to her agonizing sobs.

After a while her cries subsided and I realized she had fallen asleep on me. I laid her back onto the bed and covered her up. "Sleep well," I whispered with a smile. I shut her bedroom door behind me and went to the bathroom to clean up the evidence. After I had everything back to normal I left her house and went back to my truck. It was still raining as hard as ever. I turned my truck on and glanced once more at her bedroom window before driving away.


	8. The End

****Thanks to all my reviewers, you rock!****

* * *

**The End**

**~Bella~  
*****

I was running toward the woods, but I couldn't seem to reach the trees. I was in the middle of the same vacant field as before except this time my feet weren't stuck to the ground. I knew that if I could somehow manage to reach the dark woods I would find him there, waiting for me. My lungs were burning as I ran across the field, my knees felt weak. At the same instant I thought I was making progress, the woods disappeared all together, and I was left alone in the field once again.

I opened my wet eyes and was relieved when I realized that it was all just a nightmare. _Did I dream everything? _I thought, suddenly hopeful. I turned my bedside lamp on and searched my room, hoping to find Edward somewhere. But of course, he wasn't there. Everything had happened; I was all alone now, just like in my dreams.

The only memento I had left from the most significant time of my life, the first and greatest love of my life, was a burnt CD. Well, that and the vivid memories that were forever engraved into my mind. His perfect face, the way he said my name… forever merely memories. I walked over to my desk to turn on my CD player. I knew it would hurt to hear him play my lullaby, but I needed to hear it. I needed to know that it was real, that the past year of my life wasn't just a remarkably detailed dream. I pressed _play_ and turned the volume up. I sat down on the edge of my bed, closed my eyes, and waited for the tears to flow. I waited for a while with my eyes closed but nothing came out of my CD player's black speakers. I opened my eyes and went to see if the mute button had been pushed. After examining the CD player I noticed the display screen read: ---INSERT CD---

_Weird_, I thought. I could've sworn I had left the CD in after listening to it last night. I searched my desk for the CD case and I couldn't find it. I became frantic and started searching everywhere; I looked under my stack of homework, inside all my desk drawers, even beside my desk around the floor. At the same moment I realized I couldn't find the CD I realized all the other presents were missing too. Everything was gone except the card from Mike. _NO! _I screamed inside my head. I started looking all over my room now, searching for the CD. _He wouldn't._ I thought as I dug through my dirty laundry. _Why would he take that back?_ I asked myself anxiously while searching through the mess underneath my bed. _Does he think I was just going to forget about him that easily?_ I thought as I stormed back to my desk and picked up the birthday card that Mike had made me and glared at it. I noticed there was a yellow Post-It note stuck to it that I hadn't noticed before:

**Give him a chance**

"Are you _fucking_ kidding me?" I screamed at the top of my lungs, furious. What was his obsession with this ugly card!? Why did Mike ever have to make this piece of shit! I screamed again, this time while shredding the colourful card into a hundred pieces. I will never talk to Mike again –_ever_!

_Knock, Knock. _"Bella, are you okay in there?" Ah, crap I forgot about Charlie. I looked at my alarm clock; it was 11:30 p.m. I quickly threw all the pieces of card into the trash can beside my desk and ran to open the door. "Yeah, sorry Dad, I just," I searched for an excuse that would explain my screams, "My math homework is just frustrating."

"Oh, I thought you didn't go to school today?" Oh, right…

"I didn't, Jess brought me some work to get caught up for next week."

"Oh, all right," He said while scanning my room. When his eyes came back to me his expression changed from confused to concerned. "So, I heard, about the Cullen's. How they moved suddenly yesterday. I guess Dr. Cullen was offered an incredible last minute job out in Florida."

My breathing stopped. This time I couldn't think of anything to say, I just looked away and nodded. Florida? I don't think so. I started crying, I would really never see him again. He doesn't want me to know where he is. He doesn't want me at all. I immediately tried to stop crying for Charlie's sake. He was embarrassed beyond belief –but I couldn't help it. Charlie had just confirmed everything I feared. Edward wasn't hiding in his house, he wasn't in the woods, he wasn't under my bed –he was gone forever.

"Oh, honey-" He said as he put his strong arms around me. "Listen Bella, it's terrible that Edward had to move away, but you're young." I let go of Charlie and my tears stopped for a short second, was he serious? I glared back at him in disbelief.

"Sorry, it's just, well, it wasn't like _Edward_ arranged the whole thing-" he blabbered on until I interrupted.

"STOP SAYING HIS NAME!" I screamed and pushed him away. "He's gone okay? So no need to talk about something that's gone."

"Bella…" he gasped quietly, with a surprised look on his face.

"Look, I never want to talk about him and _them_ ever again. Now, please I'm tired." I felt bad for yelling at Charlie, but at the same time, I didn't. I never wanted to hear about him again.

"Okay, whatever you say kiddo." He said in a lighter tone, forgiving my antics. "Good night." And with that he finally left my room, shutting the door behind him.

I walked back over to my desk, looking at my empty CD player. Tears filled my swollen eyes again and spilled over. I yanked the CD player's cord out of the wall and threw the player into my closet, resulting in a loud _crash_. I hoped Charlie didn't come back to ask what that was, and he didn't.

There were so many emotions going through me all at once, anger, sadness, regret, loneliness… I didn't know what to do or think. I was pacing around my room, wanting to punch a hole in the wall, but at the same time wanting to just curl into a ball and cry.

_Jacob_. I thought when I stepped on a damp towel that was bunched up on the floor by my dresser. I vaguely remembered Jacob finding me, driving me home, and… bathing me. I was instantly horrified. _How come I was so… lifeless before?_ I wondered to myself. _And why can't I be that way now? _This morning with Jacob I couldn't even move, I couldn't talk, it's like I was frozen. I didn't care at the time that Jacob, someone I hardly knew, was undressing me. I started theorizing in my head about why I was so emotionless before, _Was it just the shock of realizing he wasn't coming back?_ I hoped it wasn't, I hoped I could go back to that place; become lifeless again. I didn't like the new emotions I was feeling. I didn't want to feel anything, I didn't want to care. _So this is why people commit suicide,_ I thought to myself. I quickly shook the dark thought out of my head when I remembered what Edward wanted me to do, to promise him. He wanted me to take care of myself, and that probably didn't include ending my own life.

I sighed out loud, I knew I would never hurt myself. I would stay loyal to him, do the one thing he asked of me, because, I still loved him. Even though he left me… he still meant _everything_ to me. I would always do everything he wanted me to. Besides, I had to have known that one day he would leave me. That he would one day move on and find a more suitable lover, like a beautiful and flawless vampire. I laughed quietly to myself at the thought. I had wanted –hoped, dreamed– that Edward would turn _me_ into a vampire. I remembered how disappointed I felt when I awoke at the hospital, still a pathetic human, still, and forever, unworthy of his love.

My dream was to become a vampire so I could spend eternity with him. I would've become perfect like Rosalie: beautiful, strong, –unable to get a paper cut. He wouldn't have to worry about hurting me, and I could've taken care of myself for once. But I wasn't going to spend forever with him, that dream was over, the end.

Still, I would always be his, and it hurt to know that he would never be mine. It was irrational and illogical, but that's love. Love makes you stupid, to say the least. I was too stupid to realize before that _this_ was inevitable. I was too in love, and too stupid. And I still am.

_What now?_ I thought to myself as I crawled back under the covers. I wondered how I was going to continue my day-to-day life now. I wondered how hard it would be going to school, and having to act normal in front of my friends. That seemed like too much effort, I thought maybe I could graduate early, or just drop-out altogether. I thought about Charlie, and how I would have to lie to him about how I was feeling, and about why Edward actually left. I couldn't tell anyone, I was all alone in my head. And with the realization of how alone I actually was, I finally felt an emotion I gladly welcomed wash over me; numbness.


	9. Thinking & Lying

****Sorry for the confusion, but the last chapter titled "The End" was just the name of the chapter. That being said, I was actually starting to wonder if people still cared about this story because I have only gotten a couple reviews over the last couple chapters. But now that I know, I will most certainly continue on! I have so much fun writing this story. I appreciate all of you and I love everyone's comments -they really motivate me to write! ..And I always have a good chuckle while reading **edwardcullenrocksmysoxs**'s comments regarding her hatred toward Jacob. (and **_**no**_** I'm not killing him off! lol)** **

* * *

**Thinking & Lying**

**~Bella~  
*****

November came and went.

December took forever.

January was a blur.

February 14 is here, today.

**~Jacob~****  
*****

I was walking along First Beach, around dinner time, by myself, thinking. I had been doing a lot of thinking lately, not that it ever got me anywhere. I only ever thought of one thing really, well one girl –Bella Swan. Which was ridiculous because I hadn't even spoken to her since… I found her soaking wet and frozen. Still, I don't know why, I couldn't get that damn girl out of my head.

I stopped at a large piece of fallen tree and took a seat on the smooth white wood. The reason I had to sit was because I kept tripping over rocks –I couldn't think of anything other than Bella. I wanted to go see her, but I heard that she was still pretty messed up from Edward leaving. Charlie told my Dad all about it, and my Dad vented to me. Thankfully, Charlie never mentioned the small fact that I had undressed his daughter, any day I didn't get beat-up by the Chief-of-Police was a good day for me.

I had wanted to go talk to Bella when I had first found out why exactly she was so upset –Edward Cullen. I still didn't know if he had made her walk home, and I was starting to get really pissed off about it. Everyone on the reservation hated the Cullen's, maybe it was just washing off on me. When news got out they had left for Florida, it was a bigger celebration than New Years Eve.

I told Charlie when he came over, a couple weeks after the _incident,_ to have her call me if she wanted to talk or hang out, but she never did. The thing is, I have no idea _why_ I would even want to open that can of worms. Just thinking of how messed up she was that night… but at the same time that's why I want to see her. I want to make sure she's okay, I don't know, she seemed so fragile. Or maybe I just wanted to undress her again, I mean she was pretty hot. Okay not _that_ night, but at Prom, _whoa_, she looked good.

_Today is Valentine's Day, so she is probably really depressed… I should go see her for sure._ I continued to talk myself into going to Forks to visit Bella. Weighing out the pros and cons. Pro: she would know that she had a friend to talk to. Con: she might tell me to _go to hell pervert_. _Well, I guess I have nothing to lose either way_.

I stood up and stretched my arms up towards the cloudy sky. Okay I had made my decision; I would go back to my place, hop in my Dad's truck and go to the Swan's place. My excuse would be to see if Charlie needed help with, um, washing his cruiser? No, that was lame. _Ugh, screw that I'm just going to go there and say I want to talk to her. _I told myself confidently. Honesty is the best policy they say, well until you get shut down that is.

On my way back to my place I passed the only variety store on the res. There was a Happy Valentine's Day sign, and below it read: **V-Day Gifts Sold Here! **_Hmm, maybe a gift would break the ice_, I thought. I then flipped my pockets inside out and realized I only had three quarters and a dime. Great, I bet I can buy a real impressive gift with that. I decided to check out what they had anyway, maybe I had enough for one chocolate heart. I walked through the already propped open door and entered the small store.

"Hey Jacob! Nice out today huh?" The voice was all too familiar, it was Gill, the longtime owner of this musty shack known as _Gill's Variety_.

"Hey Gill, yeah it's pretty warm." I agreed, "What kind of Valentine's gift can I get for this?" I said as I slammed my change on the counter in front of Gill. His eye brows bunched together as he looked at the four silver coins.

"Um, nothing," Gill said and started laughing.

"C'mon man, help me out, I'll pay you back later." I pleaded with the old man.

"Well, tell me, are you in _loooove_?" He said with a huge grin. I could tell he was having fun tormenting me, which was okay as long as I had something to give Bella afterward.

I rolled my eyes, "No."

He laughed again, "Oh yeah, sure, Jacob Black, _sure_," His whole body was vibrating from laughter. Okay I was kind of getting annoyed now.

"Right. So," I picked up a small package of conversation hearts and held it up for him to see, "can I take these then?"

"Sure, if you admit you're in love!" This man was insane.

"Whatever, okay yeah sure Gill, I'm totally in love." I rolled my eyes for the fifth time.

"I knew it! Have a great night!" He said with a slow motion wink. He grabbed the change off the counter and put it into the register.

"Thanks, you too." I said while shaking my head. I turned out the door and ran to my truck. Now that I had my gift I was ready to see Bella. And if she didn't want to talk to me, at least I had some candy.

**~Bella~****  
*****

"Thanks for dinner, Bells" Charlie said to me as I gathered our dirty plates to wash.

"Don't mention it," I replied. It went the same every night. An over enthusiastic "Thanks for dinner Bells" followed by an apathetic "Don't mention it" – I couldn't wait to get out of the house. For the last four months, every night after dinner I went out. I always told Charlie I was going to someone's house to study, or go shopping, or whatever. But they were all lies. I was getting pretty good at lying lately.

"Hey, do you think we could have a little talk before you leave?" Charlie said while fiddling with the salt shaker.

"Sure Dad, what's up?" I said while I sat in the chair across from him. I hoped he didn't ask for more details about where I was going. I was getting better at lying, but I still didn't like doing it.

"I know," he said and looked up at me. I just looked right back at him, hoping he wasn't referring to my constant lying. "I know you haven't been hanging out with your friends after dinner." _Crap. _

"Umm…" was all I could spit out. I was at a loss for words. I was good at lying but not _that_ good.

"Listen, it's okay, I know you've been having a hard time. Just tell me where you are going, in case of emergency please." He grabbed my hand and started to rub it.

"Okay, I'm sorry I've been lying," I said honestly, "I've been spending all my time at the library mostly, reading lets me escape…" I said, dishonestly.

"Okay, that's not so bad." he looked relieved, and I felt bad. Then his face turned to what looked like anger, "I've had enough of this moping around over, _him_." Charlie had never said _his_ name ever since I yelled at him for it, and I was so grateful.

"Moping? I go to school, I go to the –library– and I make you dinner every night. I get straight A's and my room is always spotless. How is that moping around?" I couldn't believe Charlie had seen through my charades. I thought _he thought_ that I was perfectly A-OK.

"Okay, you're right, maybe moping is the wrong word, it's more like acting. You lie to me every day, both in what you do and what you say. I'm sick and tired of this Bella. You need to move on now."

"I have." I whispered, looking at my feet.

"Bullshit Bella! Now I'm sorry but, well dammit, I'm pissed. I want you to be happy, I hate seeing you depressed. Maybe I can't help you, maybe you need your mother, I'm calling her." He said as he reached for the phone on the wall beside him.

"No! Please, I want to stay here." I started to cry, I couldn't imagine leaving Forks, I would _never_ let that happen.

"Then things need to change, right now. I'm not joking Bella. This is for your own good." He said firmly, ignoring my tears, I could tell he was dead serious. I needed to convince him I would try.

"Ok, I'll ask Jessica and Angela to go out tomorrow, we could go shopping or something." I said as I wiped the salty tears away with my sleeve. It was the best proposal I could come up with. Although I doubted either of them would go out with me now. At school I didn't talk to them, or anyone. They probably forgot I even existed. I sighed.

"You better not be lying young lady. I plan to ask their parents afterwards." How did it come to this? Charlie used to believe every word that I spoke. I would need to work hard to be honest about everything, well except one thing.

"I understand." I said with a smile. The smile was fake but he didn't seem to notice this time.

"Good. Have fun at the library." He said to me as he got up and walked over to me. "I love you Bella, more than you know." He leaned over and gave me a hug.

I hugged him tightly back and said, "I love you too Dad."

He pulled away and turned toward the living room to catch the game that I'm sure was on. I grabbed my keys and jacket from the counter and headed toward the front door. The sound of sports announcers giving a play-by-play filled the house now. I opened the door and yelled a quick bye to my dad and shut the door behind me.

The air outside was warm, but it was still cloudy. The sun was beginning to set behind the dark clouds, good thing I always carried a flashlight. I started old faithful and backed out of the driveway carefully. I definitely wasn't going to the library tonight.

**~Jacob~****  
*****

I started to get nervous once I drove past the _Welcome to Forks_ sign. This seemed like a good, well thought out plan before. Now it seemed kind of dumb. But there was no turning back now. I took a deep breath as I turned down Bella and Charlie's road. _This is it _I thought over and over.

I pulled the truck in front of the white house and left it running, because Bella's truck wasn't home. _Hmm that's odd_, I thought to myself, I had heard that she never went out with anyone from school. I thought for sure that she would be home. _Her truck could be getting repaired, or maybe she'd be home shortly... _I said to myself as I turned the truck off, grabbed the box of candy and got out.

As I was walking toward the front door I stuck the pink box into my sweater pocket so it didn't give my pathetic plan away. _Knock, Knock. _Charlie answered the door with a can of Vitamin R in his hand.

"Hey Charlie, is Bella home?" I said with a wave.

"No, sorry Jacob she actually just left. She was headed to the library." Charlie said as he rolled his eyes. "Long story." He took a long swig of beer.

"Oh, all right I'll try there then. I was in town and just wanted to say hi." I didn't even know where the library was, I didn't even know Forks had a library. "Oh where is it by the way?"

Charlie burst out laughing and responded, "Haha that's okay, not everyone is into reading like Bella, she could make a comfortable living just reading those damn love stories." He paused to take a swig of beer, "It's on the corner of Seneca Street and Trafalgar Road, a small place, red brick exterior." Oh that place was a library?

"Thanks Charlie, see ya later." I said with a smile and turned to walk back to my truck.

"Bye kid." he said behind me and closed the door.

_I can't believe I'm on my way to the library on a Friday night._ I thought to myself as I headed towards the boring place. That was a Bella was spending all her time at the library she _must _be depressed. _I know I sure as hell would be._

As I was driving down Seneca I kept my eye out for Trafalgar. _There it is _I thought to myself when I seen the tiny library on the left. I pulled into the small parking lot, which was empty. I got out of my car and headed for the door. She must've parked on the street or something. I got half-way to the entrance when I seen the CLOSED sign. I walked closer to read the hours; the library was only opened until 6 p.m. every night. When I got to Charlie's it was 6:30 p.m. _Weird._ I thought to myself, well I guess Bella lied to Charlie or something. I didn't think she was the sneaky type, but oh well. I tried. Maybe she did end up getting together with that loser who was obsessed with her, Mike or whatever his name was. I laughed to myself at the thought, _that guy was such a tool._

I slowly got into my truck, feeling a bit confused and wondering where she could be. _Hope she's okay._ I thought to myself as I opened the box of candy hearts. Waste not want not.

**~Bella~****  
*****

My knuckles were white from gripping the steering wheel so hard, and my breathing was fast. I always had this feeling when I came here, I felt…alive. I usually felt dead, empty and worthless. But when I came here I was able to drift away into my otherwise unattainable memories. Coming here was like a drug, he once said I was_ his_ drug, but… well I guess that turned out to be untrue. The truth was it was completely unhealthy for me to come here; Charlie would have me sent to live with Renee for sure if he knew anything about this. That's why I had to lie to him, there was no use trying to tell him because he would never understand –no one would.

I took my foot off the gas pedal as I approached the eerie building I longed for every second of the day. My heart started to flutter and a smile stretched across my face. I forgot all about Charlie and my meaningless life back home as I shut my truck off and gazed up at the big white house that was smiling back at me.


	10. Pick Up

****Sorry everyone for the delay… I've been extremely busy! **

**Thanks for reading :)****

* * *

**Pick Up**

**~Bella~**

I stepped out of my rusty truck and welcomed the warm breeze that touched my face. I felt goose bumps rise up on my arms when I smelt the dense forest around me, I was still smiling. I reached for the black gym bag that was in the back of my truck and searched inside for my flashlight. Once I found it I pressed the ON button and swung the bag over my shoulder.

I closed my truck door and turned to walk quickly toward the place that I ached for when I wasn't there. I bypassed the front door and went around back until I reached the sliding doors –or what was left of them. When I first came back to the Cullen house after he left I wanted desperately to go inside. To see what –if anything– was left of the place that I once thought of as my second home.

_***_

_November 18, 6:05 p.m. _

_What the hell am I doing here? _I thought to myself as I was walking around the big white Cullen house. _I shouldn't be here. _It looked the same as the last time I was there weeks ago, except the grass was longer. I had circled the empty house at least a dozen times when I finally took a break and sat on the front step.

I tried to forget about him before, but as if I could. _As if_ I was that strong. It seemed like the harder I tried to forget about him the more it hurt. It was like my brain was begging me to remember. Like it was screaming to me _Why would you want to forget him?? _I guess the truth was I didn't want to forget him, even though I should –it just hurt too much. So I finally gave in, I realized I could never move on, and I really didn't want to. Even if I could only be around somewhere he once was, I thought that could keep me, not happy, but sane, stable. And I was right; the feeling that came over me when I pulled up to his old home for the first time since he left was incredible.

I was sitting on the step and decided to lay back and enjoy the sun that just started to shine through the clouds for the first time in weeks. I laid back and closed my eyes, feeling the setting sun on my face. I stretched my arms out over my head but quickly retracted them when I felt something rough touch my right hand. I sat up and looked at what I had felt; it was a piece of paper, stuck between two wooden floor boards. I picked the paper carefully out of the porch and examined it. I couldn't believe it; it was the goodbye letter he had left me, the one I had thrown to the ground a month ago. It was still there, and still legible. I took that as a sign I was doing the right thing by going to his old place. It was what I needed to convince myself that it was normal. I placed the letter on the deck and smoothed it out the best I could. I read it four times before I carefully folded it and put it in my back jeans pocket. Seeing his hand writing again had extracted a million memories of him from my brain. I stood up and thought to myself, _I have to get inside. _

I stared at the front door and decided that trying to break it open would not only be impossible, but if anyone came by, I didn't want it to look like the place had been robbed. I remembered the sliding glass doors around the back of the big house and decided in an instant that I was going to smash my way in.

I went back to my truck and searched for something that I thought could break the glass. I found an old tire iron that had been in the back of my truck since Charlie bought it for me. It must have been Billy's, I never got around to returning it to him, and I was now glad I hadn't. I picked the rusty piece of iron up and started running back to the glass doors. _I hope this works._

I was standing in front of the two glass doors. I couldn't see what was on the other side of them, and I hoped there wasn't a pile of furniture there or something else in the way. I also hoped the Cullen's didn't believe in bullet proof glass. I gripped the tire iron with both hands and swung at the right door. The heavy thing bounced off the glass and flew out of my hands. "Ow!" I said out loud, sucking on my pinky finger. I looked at the door and noticed there was only a small scuff mark.

"I'm getting in whether you like it or not," I said out loud to the door. I picked up the tire iron and gripped it more securely this time. I bent my knees, with my left leg in front of the other, and swung as hard as I possibly could. This time the glass made a loud screeching sound and cracks spiraled out from where I had hit. "No use fighting," I said to the door and swung again. The tire iron slammed through the glass and hit the curtain that was on the other side. There was a baseball sized hole now in the door and I knew it wouldn't be long until I was inside. I started to laugh as I beat the rest of the glass out. I let the tire iron drop to the ground as I tried to catch my breath, "Told. You." I said in between gasps.

I pushed the curtain and was relieved that there was nothing behind it. I lifted it up and ducked in below it, entering the Cullen's kitchen. I gasped as a flood of new memories came over me. I looked at the oak table in the center of the room and remembered watching Alice and Edward play chess there. I looked at the fridge on the opposite side and remembered it being stocked full of all my favourite foods. I smiled and started walking forward. _I can't believe all their stuff is still here. _I thought to myself as I walked through the vacant house. _They were in such a hurry –he was in such a hurry, to leave me. _I frowned.

***

I smiled at the memory of me smashing the glass, it had been more fun than it should have. I stopped when I was outside what was once a glass sliding door. It was now a wooden sliding door. I had measured the door and ordered a piece of pine from the Fork's lumber yard. It took a while, three hours, but I finally figured out a way to mount it. I used a lot of nails, and glue. It looked like hell but it kept the rain out.

Since I didn't have a key for the door, and I did search the entire house for a spare key, I had to makeshift a door lock. I bought the strongest chain and lock I could find and when I left the house I wrapped the chain around the two door handles and put the lock on. It looked horrible, like something an eight year old boy would have on the door of his tree house. But it was the best I could come up with; I certainly couldn't ask anyone for help, or even for advice.

I stuck my key in the bulky lock and unwrapped the chain from the door handles. I slid the left, uninjured, door open and ran in quickly. I closed and locked the sliding door from inside and sighed in relief. I headed straight for the stair case at the front of the house. When I first started going to the house every night I explored every inch of the place, but now I usually just went straight to one specific room, his.

It was pitch black in the house because all the windows were covered with thick drapes, so my flash light was my only source of light until I reached Edward's room. I allowed myself to say and think his name only when I was in the house, not sure why, maybe it was another sign of me going insane.

I ran carefully up the stairs and down the hall to his room, once I entered his old space I shut the door behind me. I inhaled deeply as Edward's scent filled my nostrils. Even after all this time I could still smell him. It was pure ecstasy. I reached inside my gym bag and grabbed a hand full of candles. I set them up carefully around the room and lit them one by one. There were probably around 50 candles in all, enough for his entire room to glow. In case of emergency I had a mini fire extinguisher in my gym bag. When I first started coming here I did try the lights but not surprisingly they didn't turn on.

I had previously explored everything in Edward's old room, I had left nothing untouched. Everything was still there, his clothes, music, journals –everything. I thought long and hard before I read his journal the first time, I thought it might be rude, but I couldn't help it, I just had to read it, I wanted to know everything about him. I wanted to know every detail of his past, I wanted to know all his thoughts. I was currently on journal number six, dated one year after he had become a vampire. I found four large boxes of journals in his closet, totaling 229 journals in all. I guess when you can't sleep there isn't much to do with your time.

His early journals were full of anguish. He loved Carlisle but he wasn't sure about being a vampire. He wrote about all the criminals he killed, and he wrote about how he thought Carlisle was disappointed with him. I usually couldn't get through one page without a tear falling from my eye. I picked up journal number six and flipped to page 88 where I had left off last night.

_December 12, 1919 _

_I killed again today. His name was Emone Harshire, I heard him raping a young girl behind the popular pub downtown, where all the lonely men go to get lucky. I heard his disgusting thoughts; he intended to kill her after he made her suffer for a long while. He was a heartless killer, he deserved to die. But at the same time, what does killing him make me? I am the biggest hypocrite of all, I drank the blood of a killer, he and I are essentially one in the same._

_I let the girl, Bridget, go. Her blood smelt magnificent though, it was a close call. I wanted so badly to kill and drink both of their blood. But I knew Carlisle would be disappointed, more so than he already is with me. _

_I am forever damned – I have no soul – I am nothing_

I wiped a tear away from my left cheek and put the journal down. His entries were a lot of the time short, but they shook me to the core. I wiped my eyes and was about to continue reading when I heard a sound come from outside. I stood up and walked to his window, I pulled back the drape a bit and looked outside, there was nothing there. _Hmm probably a deer or something _I thought to myself. I had seen my fare share of wildlife since I started coming to the house in the forest at night.

I listened for another minute and after hearing nothing more I sat back on his couch and picked his journal back up.

**~Alice~**

"Jasper! Aw thank you!" I said as a vision of Jasper buying me a new Gucci bag came into my head. It was absolutely beautiful.

"You're welcome honey," Jasper said from the other room with a soft chuckle. He was shopping online in the living room. I was in the kitchen with Esme and Rosalie debating whether we should take a family trip to Paris, France.

"I think we should wait to go in January," Esme said, "Paris is stunning in the winter."

"Ew," Rosalie said, "It's winter here all the time, lets visit somewhere nice." Rosalie was painting her nails a dark red colour while sitting at the kitchen table.

"I like the Paris idea too," I proclaimed, "the shopping there is astounding!" The idea of shopping in Paris once again had me screeching with excitement. "I can get Jazz to order the plane tickets right now!" I said while dancing around the kitchen.

"Ok, whatever," Rosalie said shaking her head at us. "You're right though Alice, the shopping _is_ amazing there!" she let a smile cross her flawless face.

"Alice, come here dear," Esme said as she gestured for me to come over, "come and smell this candle I bought. Usually scented candles smell awful, well to vampires, but I really think this one is great, Tanya recommended it."

"Be right there," I said and twirled over to Esme who was hovering over the purple candle that was glowing on top of the kitchen counter. I closed my eyes as I bent over the candle and breathed in deep. The smell was familiar, and in the next second a violent vision made my body freeze.

"Alice, what is it honey?" I heard Esme say in the background while she put her hand on my shoulder to try and comfort me. However, this image was so bloody, so vile, so gut wrenching, I could not pull away from watching it. I stayed frozen, watching.

It was Bella, in our old house, being brutally murdered. I couldn't see at first who was hurting her because they were moving too fast, but when they were done they stood still and laughed. Laurent. He had come back to the Cullen house looking for us and had found Bella there. What the hell was she doing there?

"Alice?" Emse said more urgently this time, she was now shaking my shoulders. "Please, what is it?"

"Bella," I whispered, but it was loud enough for him to hear.

"Alice!" I heard him holler from outside, and then again half a second later from right in front of my face. I replayed the vision for him and his knees gave out.

"What happened?" Rosalie said, now standing in front of me, with a worried expression.

"It's what's going to happen Rosalie," I said slowly. It was going to happen in exactly three minutes. Edward had ordered me not to watch for Bella's future so I didn't anymore. But smelling the lavender candle must have been enough.

Edward was on the floor, leaning against the wall. He was in shock. He knew there wasn't enough time to save her. I wasn't going to give up that easily though. I had three minutes to think of something dammit. Esme was sitting next to Edward still trying to figure out what was going on.

"I have to talk to Bella," I thought out loud, "right now she is in Edward's old room, about to be killed by Laurent. How do I reach her?" I asked everyone while I paced quickly back and forth in the kitchen. Carlisle appeared just then with the answer I was so desperately looking for.

"Call her," Carlisle said to me, handing me his cell phone that was already dialing our old home's number.

"I don't understand," I said when the phone started to ring in my ear.

"I never cut off the second phone line," Carlisle said simply.

I nodded and listened carefully into the receiver, _Please pick up! Bella! Pick. Up!_ I thought frantically to myself.

**~Bella~**

As I opened the old leather journal and found my place I heard a faint ringing sound come from the opposite side of the room. I didn't remember finding a phone in Edward's room during my raid.

It rang again.

I stood up and walked quickly towards the sound, it was coming from inside his closet.

It rang again.

I pointed my flashlight in the direction of the ringing and noticed a small phone attached to the wall at the very back of the closet. It blended in perfectly and if I hadn't heard it ring I would have never of noticed it.

It rang again.

Now that I knew it was indeed a phone ringing, I started to wonder number one: why wasn't the phone cut off? And number two: who would be calling here? I stared at the black phone some more.

It rang again.

Whoever it was, they didn't seem to be getting the hint that no one was here. It also seemed like the Cullen's old voice mail was not on. _Maybe it's a telemarketer. _I thought to myself. Who else would it be?

It rang again.

I gasped out loud, _Charlie. _He must have found out where I had _really_ been going. I started biting my lip. I extended my hand out to pick the phone up, but then decided not to.

It rang again.

_In case of emergency. _I remembered Charlie saying before. What if something was wrong? _I could always pick the phone up but not say anything. _I told myself while reaching out for the phone. I picked it up right as it began to ring again. I put the receiver to my ear and said nothing. I just listened for whoever was on the other end to talk first.

"Don't speak. It's Alice. Be quiet. You are in danger. Do everything I tell you, and you will be okay. Quickly blow out all the candles. Then collect your stuff and go back into the closet, shut the door and lay under Edward's old clothes. Hang up the phone now, I will call back when it is safe to leave. Until then do not move or speak. Go now Bella!"


	11. Happy Valentine's Day

**Happy Valentine's Day**

* * *

**~Bella~**

With my mouth hanging wide open, I quickly hung up the discreet phone. I stood completely still and tried to listen, to hear if someone was in the house, but I still heard nothing. Then I realized it was Alice, and that I should get my ass in gear. I walked quickly out of the closet and quietly ran around the glowing room blowing out all the candles. Some were scented, some weren't. Some smelt like apples and cinnamon, some just like cheap wax. There were a million thoughts going through my mind, but none that should have been. I should have been thinking about not tripping, or the fact that I was going to die, but I kept wondering if Edward was with Alice, if he knew, if he cared that I might die soon. As I blew more and more candles out, the room started to fill with the strong smell of smoke and I thought that if anything this smell would make it _more_ obvious I was in here. Maybe that was the plan, maybe Edward told Alice to get rid of me.

Edward's room was pitch black again, except for the line of light shining from my flashlight I was holding. I pointed the light at my gym bag and threw all the candles in, spilling hot wax all over me. I bit my lip as the scorching wax adhered to my skin, again and again. Once I thought I had grabbed all my stuff, I tip-toed into the closet and closed the heavy wooden door behind me. I zipped up my bag and threw it in the corner. I then pulled a couple of Edward's v-neck sweaters off of the hangers and tossed them on my bag. Next, I spread my arms out around the remaining hanging garments and pulled them all down at once. Thankfully, this wasn't as noisy as I thought it would be. I sat down and covered my legs and torso, and then laid down in the fetal position and threw the rest over my head.

Wait –did I die and go to heaven? The smell of Edward was all around me, _he_ was all around me. The clothes he wore when we were together, all the memories… I couldn't help but smile. If I had to die then at least this was a good way to go.

I snapped back into reality and tried to focus on listening to what was outside the closet; however I couldn't hear anything except for the ringing in my own, inadequate, human ears. So I just laid there, waiting to die. I started wondering if Alice was wrong, or if maybe I forgot to do something she said. My heart started to race as I prepared for the worst, and then I heard something.

"Oh, wow, that's disgusting!" It was a man's voice, but it was muffled and I couldn't tell who it was.

"She was definitely here," I heard another voice say, it sounded higher, a female.

"With Edward?" The man asked.

"No, alone. Edward's scent is faint, the same with the rest of the Cullen's. They haven't been here for months. They must've left her here in Forks, alone." The woman answered, the truth stung. "She must still come here… and light candles. How very sad." The woman finished with a chuckle, the man joining in.

"Yeah, that's a bit odd. Do you think she's still here? Her car is outside." The man said, his voice sounding closer. I was trying not to breathe.

"Not sure, her scent is strong everywhere, but the disgusting candle smoke is giving me a headache. Let's leave."

"But I though –"

"The whole reason to kill her, was to hurt Edward… it seems he doesn't care anymore for his old human toy." _Victoria,_ I realized. Her words about Edward hurt more than her plan to kill me.

"That's true, so what now?"

"I'm not sure Laurent, we have much to think about. But don't worry, Bella's not going anywhere, and we know where to find her now." They both were laughing and then there was silence. I tried to listen to them leaving the house but I couldn't hear anything. _Maybe it was a trick_, I thought to myself, panicking again. I wished they would just get it over with if they were going to kill me. The sound of a phone ringing made me jump out of the pile of clothes.

This time I picked up the phone on the first ring. "Hello?" I whispered.

"Bella, thank God." I heard Alice's voice reply.

"Alice –what is going on?" I asked frantically.

"What are you doing there Bella?" Alice's voice sounded angry and I immediately felt embarrassed.

"I..I.." I couldn't think of an answer. I didn't really have an answer. I just kept thinking that now Edward probably knew what a hopeless, childish, loser I was.

"Ok, Bella, forget it, it's fine." Alice still sounded annoyed.

"I'm really sorry Alice," I started to cry into the phone, I felt like such an idiot.

"Shhh, stop. Oh dear… listen, I'm not sure what's going to happen now, Bella. It seems you're on a few vampire hit-lists." I wiped my runny nose with my sleeve, nodding my head.

"Alice, please come back!" I broke down, I couldn't help it. Hearing her voice was too much for me to take. I wanted her to be with me, I wanted to hug her and know she was real.

"Okay." Alice answered after a short pause.

"What?" I said back, I didn't actually believe she would give in that easily, if at all.

"I'm coming, it seems we left a bit of a mess back in Forks. Jasper will be joining me, and Carlisle, Esme, Emmett and Rosalie." I waited for her to say the name I knew she wasn't going to say.

"Wow, that would be," I paused to wipe my nose again, "so great!" If a near death experience was all it took for the Cullen's to return, then I should've almost gotten killed by vengeful vampires months ago.

"We won't be there until the morning. Go home, get some sleep, you don't need to worry, trust me." Alice said with a hint of a giggle. "Oh, and Bella,"

"Yes Alice?"

"Happy Valentine's Day." Then I heard the dial tone.

I had forgotten all about that stupid holiday. But I had to admit, that it was the best Valentine's Day I had ever had. It beat a box of cheap conversation hearts any day. I got to talk to Alice, and find out that she and the rest of –almost the rest of– the Cullen's were coming back tomorrow. I couldn't wait to hug each and every one of them.

I grabbed my bag and ran out of Edward's old room, down the stairs, through the kitchen and out the door. I wrapped my ghetto lock on the sliding doors and hoped Esme wouldn't be too pissed about it. I ran back to my truck in a state of bliss, I would soon see the family I once dreamed of being a part of, the family I still dream of being a part of.

**~Alice~**

I pressed the END button on Carlisle's cell phone and handed it back to him. I looked down where Edward was sitting and noticed he wasn't there anymore. "Where'd he go?" I asked everyone at the same time.

"He left," Emmett said, pointing to the front door.

"No kidding," I said rolling my eyes at my dim-witted brother, "do you know _where_ he left to?" Emmett just looked at me and raised his right eyebrow. He was right, it was obvious where Edward went, to Forks.

"Hmm," I said trying to look into the future. I seen Edward arriving at Bella's house in three hours and watching over her. He didn't plan to let her out of his sight.

"Yeah, he'll be with her," I confirmed to everyone. "She's fine." Everyone exhaled and started hugging each other. Even though we had to leave Bella in Forks, we all still loved her very much.

"I'm not sure if our seeing Bella will make things better," Carlisle said what everyone was thinking.

"But what other choice do we have?" Esme chimed in.

"We could stay here, let her take care of herself. She's going to die eventually anyway." Rosalie said, putting the finishing touches on her manicured nails.

"Rosalie!" Esme shouted at her, "Imagine if Edward heard you say that?"

"He's probably a thousand miles away by now," Rosalie responded. "What he doesn't know, won't hurt him."

"I'll hurt _you_ if you don't shut it," I said as I threw the scented candle at her."You can stay here then if you don't care about Bella. She doesn't need you."

"You're going Rosalie," Carlisle said softly, and with that my selfish sister finally got up and out of the room in a blur.

"I think we should go to Forks, hunt Victoria and her minion and leave as quick as possible." Emmett said, while looking at Carlisle for approval.

"Yes," Carlisle started, "we are the ones who introduced Bella to those killers in the first place, it's our duty to make things right."

"And then what Carlisle?" Esme asked, "Bella is a clumsy, danger-magnet, she is always going to need our help, what will we do the next time? The time after?"

"I'm not sure Esme, I suppose we will serve as her protectors for as long as necessary," Carlisle said as he gently put his arms around his wife. "Edward loves her, and until the day he doesn't anymore, we will be there for her."

"You're such a kind man," Esme said as she stood on her toes to kiss Carlisle on the lips.

"Unbelievable," I heard Rosalie say from the other room.

"Okay, Alice, Jasper, Rosalie and Emmett take the Jeep, Esme and I will take the Mercedes. We don't need to bring anything; all of our old stuff is still at the house. Have a safe trip, and see you in Forks." Carlisle said with a smile and turned for the garage door, hand-in-hand with Esme.

"Rose," Emmett called into the other room, "time to go." He looked at me and smiled, "I'm so excited to go back to Forks."

"So am I Emmett," I said as I smiled back at him. "I miss Bella." I turned to look at Jasper and noticed the expression on his face wasn't that of excitement. "What's wrong Jasper?" I asked, but I already knew.

"I will go to Forks with you to kill those nomads, but I will not be visiting Bella." He said as he looked out the window.

"I understand," I said as I grabbed his hand and kissed his cheek.

"This is so typical," Rosalie entered the room stomping her feet. "Edward is so," she started but seen the expression on my face and stopped and just shook her head and stomped off towards Emmett's Jeep. We all laughed and followed our dramatic sister into the garage.

**~Edward~**

It had been months since I had watched her sleep, I never thought I'd be here again. I was sitting on her computer chair, a few feet away from Bella as she slept. I was examining her face, she looked troubled. I hoped she wasn't having a nightmare, I sighed silently. I started to wonder how many nightmares I had caused her. I stood up and started pacing in her room.

_What am I doing?_ I wondered to myself as I walked quickly back and forth. _Should I wake her?_ I wanted to so badly, but I knew I shouldn't. I had promised Bella she would never see me again. I started to wonder if Bella missed me still. She must, she was in my old room, reading my journals. I sighed again and came to a stand still. I looked at Bella as she tossed and turned.

_You almost killed her _I reminded myself as I debated waking her again. _She is better off without you, whether she realizes it or not_. I nodded my head in agreement with myself. I would watch over her for as long as it took, but I wouldn't make my presence known to her, it wasn't fair to Bella.

I walked slowly over to her side, and knelt down beside her bed. Her head was at the edge of her pillow, facing me. I leaned in closer, our faces were only inches apart. Every time she exhaled a wave of pleasure came over me. I could hear her heart beating in her chest and I could feel the warmth coming off of her body. I leaned in another inch and closed my eyes. I hoped I wasn't overestimating my self control when I gently pressed my cold lips to hers.

The feeling was better than I remembered; I had to quickly pull my head back before I did something foolish. "I miss you, Bella" I whispered out loud, "I miss you so much," I stood up with a sigh and walked back over to the computer chair, where I would stay, as long as she needed me to.


	12. I Missed You

****Thanks for everyone's continued support. Love the reviews!****

**I Missed You**

**~Bella~**

I would know this place anywhere, the meadow. The place where Edward first showed me his true, beautiful self. I was here again, and he wasn't. I was laying on top of hundreds of purple and blue wild flowers, arms and legs stretched out around me, eyes closed. The sun was shining bright in the sky, its warm rays were beating down on my face: it must be a dream.

When I realized I was only dreaming, I didn't care, because this didn't seem like a nightmare. There was nothing wrong here; I was simply laying down in our secret place, feeling quite content. I could hear the sounds of the forest around me, and I could smell it in the warm breeze. It was the most beautiful smell I had ever smelt. It made the hair on the back of my neck stand at attention and it made me smile wide. It was a familiar smell, a comforting one. I took a deep breath in and tried to pin-point exactly what it was.

Of course, it was him. I opened my eyes and seen his angel face looking down at me. His expression was playful; he had the tiniest of crooked grins on his face. I sat up quickly, stunned. This was the first time his glorious face had ever been in one of my dreams, and I didn't want to scare him away. "Edward," I said to him, while I reached out to grab his hand. But he stepped backward, his playful expression gone now. He turned and fled into the forest without looking back, his magnificent smell leaving with him. And then I was alone again, in our meadow, all alone.

My eyes flew open and instead of staring at a gorgeous face, I was staring into my dark and dull room. I sighed. It wasn't the worst dream I've ever had, but it still counted as a nightmare. My body was trembling and I was out of breath. "He left," I whispered out loud while wiping the tears from my cheeks, "he always leaves." I rolled over and tried to fall back asleep, telling myself what I wanted to dream about, hoping that that might work. "Don't leave, don't leave," I quietly chanted until I drifted back to sleep.

***

My eyes flew open again, this time due to my blaring alarm clock, I must've forgotten to turn it off; today was Saturday. I reached over and quickly pressed the OFF button on the deafening thing. I tried to remember if my chant worked, but I couldn't remember if I dreamt again. I counted that as a win, at least he didn't leave me again.

I yawned as I stood up and stretched my back to the left, and then to the right. I turned around to grab my towel off of my desk chair and jumped when I seen someone sitting there. I couldn't believe my tired eyes.

"Good morning Bella," Alice said as she gracefully crossed the room to give me a hug. I wrapped my arms around her tiny, marble frame and squeezed as hard as I possibly could. Of course, I started crying.

"Alice! You came!" I said as I sobbed on her shoulder, getting her dark red designer sweater all wet.

"Of course, I said I was going to, didn't I?" She said as she pulled me away from her to look me over, she didn't look impressed.

"I know, I know. Thanks for coming. So, where are we off to?" I said, still holding tightly onto her.

"We're going to my old house; you have some explaining to do to Esme." She said as she raised her right eyebrow.

"Oh, right," I said feeling my face burn red with embarrassment. Alice just laughed her high pitched laugh and shook her head.

"Don't worry about it Bella, I was just kidding. Jasper and Carlisle already fixed it up." Alice said as she maneuvered easily out of my weak grasp. "Let's find you some clothes and get going. We have a lot to discuss."

"Yeah," I said as I recalled what had happened last night. "We better get going." I said while I threw the clothes on that she handed to me.

"Don't you believe in bathing anymore?" Alice said jokingly.

"Oh, right, I'm just kind of excited to see everyone," I couldn't help but frown as I realized the person I wanted to see the most wouldn't be there. Alice caught on.

"He thought it would be best, if he stayed behind." Alice said with a smile. "Besides, you got me! Isn't that good enough?" Alice started giggling again and that made my frown disappear.

"Yes Alice, it's more than I could ever have asked for. I am so happy you're here." I ran and hugged her again and we both started giggling as we fell to the floor.

**~Edward~**

"I'm going to stay upstairs, so I can hear what's going on," I told Carlisle, "But she won't know I'm here, so please act like I'm not." I looked over at Rosalie as she imagined herself telling Bella the truth. She smiled. _Pain in my ass_. I shook my head and looked away from her.

"Do you think you'll be able to handle it?" Carlisle started, "I mean you could go hunting with Jasper while Bella's here."

"No, I will be fine. Thanks. Okay, Alice and Bella just arrived, I'll see you all after she leaves." I said as I ran up to my room.

I heard the door open, and then I could smell her warm blood. "Bella!" I heard Esme yell as she ran to hug Bella.

"Esme! I'm so so _so_ sorry about your kitchen door," I smiled as I heard Bella say this, I could only imagine how embarrassed she was. I could see in Esme's mind how good it felt to see and hug Bella again. I wanted to race down the stairs, pick her up and tell her that I'll never leave her again, that I was right here. But knew that wasn't what was best for her, I was wrong for her. I shook the thought out of my head and focused on Carlisle.

"We have missed you Bella," he said, "and we are sorry about Victoria and Laurent, we had no idea they would come back."

"I missed you, too, a lot." I heard Bella say, "thank you for coming back."

"Don't worry Bells," I heard Emmett say, "We're going to find and _thoroughly_ destroy those pesky vampires." I squeezed my fists together at the thought of anyone trying to harm Bella.

"Do you have a plan?" I heard Bella ask. Her voice calmed me down instantly. I smiled once again.

"Seek and destroy," I heard Emmett say as he picked up Bella and hugged her, swinging her around in the air. "Don't worry little Bella, you'll never see them again." I wanted nothing more than to hug her like he was. I saw Bella smile at him in his mind. The thought of telling her the truth crossed my mind again, but I quickly decided against it.

"So what do I do now then?" I heard Bella ask my family.

"Just go about your life as you normally would." Carlisle answered. "One of us will be looking over you at all times until we have solved this problem." I saw Bella frown in Carlisle's mind as she heard this.

"Oh, I thought we were going to be able to spend some time together." Bella said quietly, looking down at the floor now.

"Most of the time we will be out hunting lunatic vampires." Alice said, "but don't worry we won't leave before saying goodbye. I promise." My sister said as she kissed Bella on the cheek.

"Oh, and here," I heard Esme say as she handed Bella a gold key.

"What is this for?" I heard Bella ask as she examined the key in her hand.

"A spare house key dear," Esme said with a huge smile. "In case you wanted to come and keep the house company while we're away." I seen Bella's face flush bright pink in Esme's mind and I had to cover my mouth with my hand to stop from bursting out laughing.

"Thanks," Bella said with an embarrassed smile.

"Okay, well I'm going to take you back home now Bella. We have to get started." I heard Alice say as she started walking towards the front door.

"Oh, okay," Bella said softly. I watched as each member of my family went and hugged Bella and said goodbye, all except Rosalie, who stood in the back. When Alice and Bella had left I went back downstairs to join my family again.

"She looks awful," Rosalie chirped at me with a smile. A warning growl rose up out of my chest which wiped the ugly smile off of her face.

"Stop," Carlisle said to both of us.

"All right," Esme started, ignoring the both of us. "Now, just as Jasper ordered, Edward, you're job will be to look over Bella. Rosalie, Emmett, Carlisle and I will track Victoria, and Alice and Jasper will track Laurent." I nodded in agreement.

"Sounds good to me!" Emmett said with much enthusiasm. "I can't wait to catch me a feisty redhead." Rosalie punched Emmett in the arm and I couldn't help but laugh.

"Does everyone have their cell phones?" Esme asked all of us, and we all replied with a collective nod.

"Good luck," Carlisle said with a smile as everyone dispersed.

My feet couldn't move fast enough as I raced to Bella's house, I wanted to beat Alice there.

**~Bella~**

"Bye Alice," I said as I climbed out of Emmett's Jeep, "come back and visit soon." I said with a forced smile.

"Of course," Alice said with a wink. I closed the heavy door and watched as Alice drove out of sight.

I turned around and realized that Charlie's truck wasn't home. It was a Saturday, so he was no doubt out fishing with Billy. I was relieved that I wouldn't have to make small talk with him, not yet at least.

I unlocked the front door and entered my quiet home. It felt especially empty after my visit with the Cullen's. I walked to the kitchen feeling myself frown. I tried to cheer myself up; I told myself that today had been one of the best in months. But I still felt sad. Maybe it was because I knew that soon they would be gone, without a trace once again. Or maybe it was because I still half-expected to see Edward at the big white house –I loved setting myself up for disappointment.

I grabbed an apple and sat on one of the old kitchen chairs. I was thinking about what I was going to do today. I didn't have any homework, and I was feeling antsy. There was no way I was going to be able to just sit in my room the whole day. Then I remembered what I had promised Charlie last night at dinner. My promise to ask Jessica and Angela to hang out with me. I rolled my eyes at the thought. I knew they would never agree to that, and honestly I didn't feel like girl talk, they would ask about Edward no doubt.

I stood up and walked toward the garbage to throw out my apple core and I noticed a note laying on the counter.

_**Bells-**_

_**  
Jacob stopped by last night. He was looking for you. Give him a call back, he's a nice kid. **_

_**I'm fishing with Billy, be back later.**_

_**Love, Dad **_

The thought of Jacob didn't even make me cringe –that was a good sign. It might be a little awkward at first, he did undress me once… but he was obviously past that. _Aw, what the hell._ I grabbed the phone off of the wall and dialed the Black's number.

It rang twice before someone picked up. "Hello?" it was Jacob's voice, but I had to make sure.

"Hi, is this Jacob? It's Bella." I said while biting my lip.

"Oh, hey Bella! Yeah it's me, I mean him," he laughed, "So what's up? I missed you last night."

"Yeah, sorry, I was at the library." I lied.

"Oh, right, the _library_." Jacob said, I had the feeling he was on to me. "Well, do you want to hang out today or something?" he said a-matter-of-factly.

"Ok, what do you have in mind?" I asked, more relaxed now. Even through the phone Jacob was very calming.

"Ugh, how 'bout," he paused, "I don't know," he said with a chuckle. "It's Forks, there isn't shit all to do." I started laughing now with him.

"You're right," I said while smiling. My dream from last night crossed my mind, I remembered the meadow. "Hey, do you want to go hiking?"

"Hiking? Sure, where?"

"I'm not exactly sure, I found this place last year, but I can't exactly remember how to get to it." I said with a frown, I couldn't remember at all how to get to the meadow. I only remembered how to drive there.

"If you know the area it's in, we can find it. I'm good with maps and compasses." Jacob said confidently.

"Great, I'll pick you up in a bit." I said into the phone, happy at just the thought of finding the meadow again. I hung up the phone and went to my room to grab a suitable pair of hiking boots and my truck's keys.

***

When I pulled up to Jacob's house he was already waiting outside. He had a huge grin across his face that was contagious, I smiled wide. I felt a sudden spark of excitement, something I hadn't felt in a while.

"Hey!" Jacob exclaimed as he jumped into my truck. "Ready for some exercise?" I couldn't help but notice that Jacob had gotten much bigger since the last time I had seen him. His shoulders were much broader and his jaw was more defined; he had lost his baby fat.

"Oh yeah, I am all right," I said as I rolled my eyes dramatically. "It looks like you've already been working out without me." I said as I pointed at his already buff body.

"Oh," Jacob said as he looked at himself, he laughed, "Nah, just a growth spurt. So where are we headed to?" he said as he looked out the passenger side window at the passing trees.

"Not sure," I said honestly.

"Ok," he laughed again, "well I brought a map and stuff so, we should be good."

The drive wasn't awkward at all, I almost forgot entirely about our encounter in September –almost. Jacob did most of the talking, and I talked a lot for me. We talked about school, Charlie, boring Forks –he didn't mention Edward or the Cullen's, for which I was grateful. I was starting to really like Jacob Black.

I stopped my truck at the same spot I had when I came here with Edward, the place where we shared our first kiss. I frowned at the bittersweet memory. "Don't worry Bella, we'll find it." Jacob said as he misread my expression.

"Thanks, Jake." I said while I jumped out of my truck. "This way," I said as I pointed through the trees.

"Wait, we're not taking the path?" Jacob said as he stared at the path that was headed in a different direction.

"No, this is the way, is that a problem?" I asked, hoping it wasn't.

"No, no, it's just that, well I never took you for an _off the path _type of girl." Jacob said as he winked at me. I raised my right eyebrow and stared at him silently. "Okay, let's go Columbus." Jacob mocked as he stormed off in the direction I was pointing at. I shook my head and followed.

As we walked though the thick forest Jacob spoke the most, like before. I was mainly focusing on not tripping on all the fallen branches and rocks. He did a good job at keeping pace with me. "Wow, I hope we get back before next week," he joked, just as Edward had…

"Ha ha," I said as I looked up and stuck my tongue out at him. When I looked up I saw an arrangement of trees in the distance that looked very familiar. Could we have found it this quickly? "Jake!" I yelled in excitement and looked to my side excited to tell him I thought I found it, but he wasn't there. "Jake?" I said louder as I turned and looked behind me.

"Sorry," Jake said quietly, a few paces behind. He was sitting on a fallen tree, holding his stomach in one hand and his head in the other. "I feel really sick all of a sudden, it's a weird feeling."

I started to walk toward him and I playfully put my hand on his head to take his temperature. "Ow!" I said as I yanked my hand back. His head felt like it was on fire. "Jacob, you are burning up, we should get you home fast." I said as I tugged at his arm, trying to lift him up, but he didn't budge.

"What were you saying before?" Jacob said, out of breath.

"Oh, I think we found the spot I was looking for." I said as I turned around and pointed to the trees that looked familiar.

"Oh, go see it then. I'll wait here." Jacob said as he motioned for me to go ahead.

"No, it's fine, you're sick." I said as I tugged at his arm again. "We can find it some other time."

"No, go." Jacob said as he looked up at me with a smile. "I'm fine, I'm just exhausted, I can't keep up with you Bells." He said with a wink.

"Yeah, yeah," I said as I looked at the trees again. I really wanted to see if that was indeed the meadow, but I felt horrible for leaving Jacob. I kept looking at the trees and back to Jacob's pained face.

"Just go!" Jacob said as he rolled his eyes. I nodded and turned and walked quickly toward the familiar trees. I looked back and Jacob had laid down on the fallen tree. I started running, and I made it all the way without tripping. I ran through the trees, and into the meadow.

It was the real deal all right. But it was wrong, there were no wild flowers, and the sun wasn't shining through the clouds. Plus, the smell was all wrong. I frowned and turned around to go back to Jacob, disappointed. I would have to try my best not to cry in front of him.

I was looking at the muddy ground when I heard someone say my name in the distance, someone that wasn't Jacob. I looked up and seen Laurent standing five feet away from me, blocking my way out of the meadow. I froze.

"Hello, Bella." Laurent said with a menacing smile, his eyes were ruby red. He started to walk towards me, and I just stood there helpless, and frozen.


	13. It's Better This Way

**~Sorry for the delay… I've been too busy seeing New Moon 4 times! **

**Haha, how do you guys like it?!?~**

**It's Better This Way**

**~Edward~**

Of course Bella would go to the one place I couldn't –La Push. I sighed out loud. How was I supposed to protect her when I couldn't be with her? I was pacing back and forth at the line I was forbidden to cross. I started to wonder if anyone would even notice if I crossed the line, but decided against it –I didn't want to start a war, not yet anyways.

I had been pacing for what seemed like hours when I heard a familiar roar of an engine that calmed me immediately. It was Bella's truck, coming back towards me. I quickly ran around the corner to retrieve the inconspicuous SUV I had rented for following Bella. It was a black Cadillac Escalade, with its windows tinted –way past the legal limit of course. I had once told Bella I disliked this bulky vehicle, and I hoped that she wouldn't think I was in it –not like I planned to get within a distance she would be able to see– but just incase.

As Bella's truck approached I started to hear the thoughts of Jacob Black, to say he was overjoyed that Bella had invited him out would be an understatement. I'm not sure why, but that really irritated me. My irritation was lost when Jacob looked at Bella and I seen her smiling in his mind. Beautiful.

Seeing her smile brought back a flood of memories, and I contemplated jumping out in front of her truck and begging her to take me back. I shook the recurring thought out of my head again. If she was happy with Jacob, she should be with him, I should be happy for her. So, why wasn't I?

Once she passed me I waited a couple minutes before I pulled out and started following her –she drove remarkably slowly. I was still at a distance where I could hear Jacob's thoughts. I heard him ask Bella where they were going, and I had a good guess of the destination. The meadow, the place I first showed Bella my true self, and the place where we shared our first kiss. I frowned, knowing that I would never get to share either experience with her again. _It's better this way_ I kept chanting to myself over and over.

Once we finally reached the trail, I stayed about a football field's length adjacent to them, making sure to stay silent. I couldn't believe it, but Bella was headed in the right direction of the meadow on her first try. I was truly impressed. I started to wonder what she would do once she reached it, would she tell Jacob about me?

I was lost in a train of thought when I picked up a smell that was not human; it caught me by complete surprise. "Laurent," I said out loud, too low for human ears. I quickly started following the scent and it was leading me closer to Bella. I was inching my way closer to her when I realized she had stopped. It seemed like Jacob was starting to feel sick. I stopped too, I didn't want her to see me. But I was still searching for Laurent with my eyes, I couldn't see him.

While I was scanning the dense forest, I started to smell something totally different. It wasn't human, and it wasn't a vampire. It was something I hadn't smelt in many decades. I spun quickly around and seen a werewolf staring back at me with eager eyes.

I couldn't believe my eyes; I didn't think werewolves were still around here. Carlisle had told me that they had died out over the years. I held out my hands, palm forward, in an attempt to show that I meant no harm. I could hear the big black wolf's thoughts, his name was Sam, and he was the leader of the new Quileute wolf pack. He knew exactly who I was, and wanted to know what the hell I was doing back.

"Hello, Sam," I started, very, _very_ quietly. "Please, I mean you or anyone any harm, I was simply looking after Bella." The wolf turned its head back toward where Bella and Jacob were and shook his head. What he thought next nearly made me gasp out in horror.

"Jacob hasn't turned into a wolf yet," Sam thought, "he's no danger to Bella." I hadn't realized that Jacob had even the slightest chance of changing, or I would have taken her steering wheel off of her truck. "Actually," Sam looked back toward Jacob laying down on a fallen tree, "it looks like he's starting to change," I turned around and seen Jacob curled over with a pained look on his face. I was relieved when I didn't see Bella standing near him.

"Where's Bella?" I whispered out loud, while I scanned around the forest, I couldn't believe that I had lost her in just one minute. I started to panic as I quickly started to follow her scent. It was leading to the meadow, I sighed in relief as her scent was growing stronger. But just as quickly, I started to panic again as I realized that Laurent's scent was also growing stronger. I stopped just outside the entrance of the meadow, and was horrified as I read Laurent's thoughts. I stood there listening to him think about how thirsty he was, how badly he wanted to kill her, and as he thought about how much more badly Victoria wanted to kill her –and all this was because of me.

I didn't even notice all the wolves that were around me. They were all thinking the same thing I was –_I want to kill that filthy bloodsucker_. They were waiting on Sam's order to attack. Sam was waiting for Laurent to make a move, he must not have known that Laurent wasn't a Cullen. "He's not one of us," I whispered to the wolves that surrounded me. "Kill him."

Sam looked at me and thought, "Wait," I didn't want to wait, I wanted Laurent dismantled and on fire. I bent my knees and stood ready to attack at the first sign Laurent was going to hurt Bella. We all listened intently on their conversation.

"Hi, Laurent," Bella said, apprehensive.

"I didn't expect to see you here." Laurent said while standing completely still. His blood lust for Bella must have been covering up mine and the wolves scent.

"Yeah, I was just, hiking." Bella said with a weak smile.

"I see that," Laurent said as he looked Bella over. "Say, are you still a pet of the Cullen's?" I suppressed a growl.

"Um, not really."

"Oh, where is Edward?"

"I'm, not sure." Bella said, her voice broke on the last word. I felt ill.

"Ah, well I'm here on a favour to Victoria." I suppressed another growl when I heard her name, my lip curled over my teeth.

"Oh," Bella whispered, wide-eyed.

"Yes, she thinks it's only fair that she kills you, since your Edward killed her mate James." He said with a disgusting smile. I tensed, ready to spring. "I was supposed to see if you were still under the Cullen's protection, but it seems you aren't." Bella just shook her head slowly.

"So…" Laurent began, stepping closer to Bella, "I'm sorry but I'm really thirsty, and I think I'm going to have to kill you." I couldn't take it any longer, I sprang for him; too fast for Bella to see. I grabbed him by the neck and threw him back at the awaiting wolves who caught him and started running away with him deeper into the forest. I felt confident enough in their ability to kill him, and I wasn't going to leave Bella's side for a second.

I quickly moved deeper into the forest so Bella wouldn't see me when she came out of the meadow, and I noticed Jacob was no longer laying on the tree. I figured one of the wolves had picked him up and brought him home. It took Bella a few minutes to work up the courage to run out of the meadow, and when she did her eyes were wide, and she looked much paler than usual. I felt bad for her, but relieved to know she was okay.

"JACOB!" she yelled, when she realized Jacob was no where to be found. I imagine she thought Laurent got him. "Jake!" she yelled, "Where are you?" she didn't spend too long yelling for Jacob before she started to head back to her truck.

She was moving quicker than usual –which meant she tripped a lot. I wanted nothing more than to pick her up and carry her home. But I would just stay at a safe distance, it was better that way. It took Bella three times as long to reach her truck than it did to find the meadow. She was exhausted when she finally started her truck and sped away.

**~Bella~**

What the hell just happened? I couldn't figure out what I just saw. I couldn't figure out how I was still alive, and most importantly, I couldn't figure out what happened to Jacob. One minute Laurent was about to have me for dinner, the next I see him being flung backwards into the forest, followed by a lot of extremely loud growling. I thought at first that maybe Jasper or Emmett was there, but the growls I heard didn't come from vampires. It didn't make sense.

I was trying to figure out what I was doing, where I was going. Should I go straight to Jacob's house? But what would I say to Billy? I didn't know if I should go to the Cullen house or if I should go straight home to make sure Charlie hadn't shown up at the wrong time. "Home," I whispered out loud after I had made my decision.

My heart was pounding as I pulled up to the curb in front of my house. Charlie's car was home, he must've been back from fishing. I turned my truck off and sprinted into the house.

"Hey Bella!" I heard Charlie say.

"Dad!" I said, not able to hide my excitement at the fact that my father was still breathing.

"Someone's excited to see me!" Charlie said with a chuckle, followed by a swig of beer.

"Dad, I seen something, while I _heard_ something in the woods. It sounded big."

"Yeah, we've been getting reports of giant bear sightings, Bella, please stay out of the woods."

"No problem," I said, trying to figure out if I should mention the fact that Jacob was missing. I decided to call him. I said a silent prayer to myself, and hoped the first thing I heard was Jacob's kind voice.

I dialed the number too quickly the first time and screwed up, I tried to slow my fingers down and managed to get it right on the second attempt. It rang three times before someone answered. It wasn't Jacob.

"Hello?" The man's deep voice asked.

"Hi, it's Bella, is Jacob home?" I asked, trying to keep my voice even.

"Oh, hi Bella, it's Sam." the man sounded relieved that it was me for some reason. "Yes, Jacob is home," I sighed out loud. "But, I'm afraid he is really sick, so he can't talk. I'll tell him you called."

"Ok, thanks Sam." I said and hung up the receiver. I was happy that Jacob was safe, but with that realization came a million other questions. Like, how did he get home? Why did he leave me alone? Did he see Laurent? Did Laurent hurt him? Did he see Emmett or Jasper or whoever pulled Laurent back? I shook my head and decided to just be happy that he was alive.

I slowly walked up to my room, hoping I wouldn't find Laurent or Victoria waiting for me. I opened my door and seen a vampire, but it wasn't one that wanted me dead thankfully. "Hello, Alice," I said as I ran up to her and gave her a big hug.

"Are you okay Bella?" Alice said as she examined my face. So, she knew what had happened already.

"I'm fine," I said as I tried to smile, Alice seen past it.

"Listen, everything's okay," Alice began, "Emmett and Jasper were able to kill Laurent. I'm sorry it came that close."

"Laurent's dead?" I asked her again, just to make sure I wasn't hearing things.

Alice giggled and nodded her head. "Yup, no need to worry about him any more."

"But what about Jake?" I asked her, and her smile disappeared.

"What happened?!" I said as I grabbed her arms, "did he get attacked?"

Alice shook her head, "No, he's fine. He was able to escape… he hitchhiked back to his house."

"Why?"

"Um, well I don't know. Because he's rude? You shouldn't see him anymore, that boy is trouble. Not good." Alice's face was serious, but I couldn't believe the words that were coming out of her mouth.

"What are you talking about? Jacob's my best friend." I realized this just as I said it.

"Okay, I'm sorry," Alice started, "either way, no need to worry about him or you."

"Victoria…" I whispered.

"She is, a bit of a pain, but I'll see when she's coming. And we'll be ready to attack."

"But you didn't see Laurent, why is that?"

"I, I don't know." Alice said and turned around, avoiding my prying eyes. I got the feeling that she _did_ know, but she wasn't about to tell me.

"Okay, that's fine. Can you take me back to your house?" I asked Alice with a smile.

"Why?" Alice said as she narrowed her eyes.

"I want to thank Emmett and Jasper for everything."

"Oh, well they aren't home, they are out looking for the other vampire that's trying to kill you." I cringed. "I'll pass along your message though.

I sighed, "Okay, thanks Alice."

"No problem Bella," Alice said as she hugged me tightly. "I have to go though, but don't worry you're safe here. I'll be checking in soon."

I was disappointed that I would be left alone again, but I knew that my whining wouldn't change her mind. "Okay, see you later."

"Bye –oh, and Bella, stay out of the forest." Alice said with a serious glare, I nodded. She must have been thinking about the bears Charlie was talking about. Or maybe Victoria was hiding out there too. I watched as Alice elegantly jumped out of my window, and disappeared.

***

For the last week I had been waiting for Jacob to return my dozens of phone calls. Every time I called, Billy said he was too sick to come to the phone, but I just wanted to hear Jacob's voice for a second –or two. I decided that I was going to give Jacob a surprise visit. I was going insane staying alone in my house, I missed him.

I waited until Charlie had already left –to go fishing I imagined– to go see Jacob. He would have probably told me to stop pestering the Black's. I went out to my car and put the key in the ignition, but it wouldn't start. Which was odd, considering I had just driven to school everyday the past week. I guessed that I wasn't going to be making any surprise visits anytime soon.

As I started to walk toward my front door I heard a car pull up, it was the cruiser. What was Charlie doing home so early? He had just left. I walked towards my dad and instantly knew why he was home early. His face was pale white, and had a sheet of sweat on it. His mouth was hanging open, and it looked like he was about to throw up Cheerio's everywhere.

"Bella, I'm sick." Charlie said bluntly as he walked past me.

"Are you okay? Do you need anything?" I asked as I opened the front door for him.

"Just rest. Thanks."

A thought popped into my head that was both irresponsible and desperate. "Hey, dad, my truck won't start can I use your car?"

Charlie looked at me with curious eyes; he knew that _I knew_ I wasn't allowed to use his cruiser. "I want to see Jake, I think he's feeling better now." I lied, but he wouldn't let me go unless he thought I was welcomed there.

"Fine," he said, obviously not in the mood to argue. "Be careful." He added as he threw his keys at me and headed up the stairs to his room.

"Thanks!" I said as I ran out the front door towards the car I wasn't supposed to drive; I would have to be extra cautious. I slipped onto the black leather seat of the cruiser and it started up perfectly. It didn't make any of the clunking sounds my old truck made. I could get used to this.

I didn't get butterflies until I pulled up to Jacob's house. I wondered if I was actually making a mistake. But then the thought of being alone for another week crossed my mind and I knew I couldn't bare it. When I was around Jake I felt so much better, he was addicting.

I got out of my dad's car and sprinted to his house. Billy opened the door after my second knock. "He's not in," Billy said with a straight face. He was clearly annoyed with me.

"Oh, where is he? I guess he's feeling better?" I was glad that he was feeling better, but I was upset that he hadn't called me.

"I don't know, out with friends somewhere." He said with that same blank expression.

"Oh, okay."

"Bye Bella." Billy said before he closed the door in my face. I thought that was a bit rude, but I guess I had been a bit of an annoyance this past week. Maybe that's why Jacob didn't call.

I turned around and walked slowly back to the cruiser. I guess Jacob would call when he wanted to talk to me, and I really hoped that that was sooner than later. I was thinking about what would happen if he never did call when I noticed a half naked boy walking on the side of the road, it was Jake.

I quickly pulled the car over and turned it off. Jacob had to of noticed me, but he just ignored me and continued to walk down the road. Yup, he was definitely annoyed with me. "Jake!" I yelled as I sprinted towards him. He didn't look back at me.

Now _I_ was annoyed, "Jake, stop! Please!" I screamed as I finally was able to catch up to him. I was now walking right beside him, and he still didn't bother to turn his head to acknowledge my presence. Maybe Alice was right, maybe he was just a rude boy. I shook the ridiculous thought out of my head.

"So, I'm glad that you're feeling better." I said as normally as possible. This finally got his attention and he looked over at me, and by looked I mean glared. "What's wrong? Why are you ignoring me?" I just cut straight to the chase.

"Bella," Jacob said as he stopped dead in his tracks. "I'm sorry, we can't be friends. Please go away."

"What?" I gasped, it felt like I had been punched in the stomach.

"Go away Bella. I don't want to be friends with you anymore. Take a hint." Jacob said, he face hard.

"But, why?" I whispered, I knew he would probably be annoyed, but it was Jake, he was so easy going. But not tonight, tonight he was different. Like he was a totally different person. I wanted the old Jacob back.

"Why?" Jacob repeated with a cruel smile. "You don't want to know why."

"Yes, I do. Please tell me." I begged.

"Fine, you can blame those _bloodsuckers_ you love so much." He must have seen Emmett and Jasper, but how would he know they were vampires? Maybe he finally believed the stories Billy told him.

"I don't, understand." I lied.

"Right," Jacob said with a chuckle. "Listen, Bella, you're great and all, but– " I cut him off.

"But I'm not good enough to be your friend? Don't worry about it, I get that a lot." I could feel the tears spill over and down my cheeks. I turned around, and headed quickly back to my car, I wanted to leave before the hysterics started.

"It's just better if we weren't friends." I heard Jacob yell from behind me. I just kept walking. I opened the door to the cruiser and fumbled with the car keys. I turned the car on and hoped that Jacob wasn't standing in front of the car as I took off down the road. I could barely see through my tears, I knew I should slow down but I wanted to be as far away from Jacob as I could. He had broke my already broken heart.

**~Jacob~**

I was sitting on my couch with Billy sitting across from me, he was staring at me. "What?" I asked in an angry voice.

"Nothing," Billy said as he shook his head and turned the TV on. "It's just that," he started again with a sigh and I rolled my eyes. "You know it's for the best, that you don't go near Bella."

"Yeah, I know." My life had been turned upside down in the last week. I was now a werewolf. Unbelievable. Just when things with Bella were starting to get good –BAM I turn into a wolf. Then, I learn that Edward is a vampire. And Bella knew! Every story that Billy had told me was true. I couldn't seem to wrap my head around it. "Bella shouldn't be around a werewolf," I said to Billy and he nodded his head. "But, why is it okay for her to be around all those vampires?" Billy shrugged his shoulders.

"Some things are out of our control." He said while watching the football game that was on the TV.

"We should just go and kill them all, and all of our problems would disappear with them." I wanted nothing more than to make Edward feel the pain that he caused Bella.

"Get that thought out of your head." Billy said and looked at me with serious eyes.

"I know, I know, the treaty. I get it. Don't worry." That seemed to please Billy because he continued to watch the game again.

I sighed and got up off of the couch. It was almost midnight and I was restless. I couldn't get Bella off of my mind. I had been such an asshole to her. I wondered how upset she was. I remembered the night I had picked her up and cringed.

"I'm going out." I said to Billy, and he waved me goodbye. I had to go tell Bella I was sorry. I didn't care what Sam or Billy said –this was _my_ life.

I decided to take Billy's truck so Sam and the rest of the pack wouldn't know what I was planning. It only took me about ten minutes until I reached the Swan house. I seen that Bella's bedroom light was on, and I decided that I was just going to jump in through her window. As I approached her window I caught a scent that made the hair on the back of my neck stand up.

"You can't see her," I heard Edward say before I seen him step out of the shadows.

"The hell I can't, get away from me leech." I knew Bella cared for him, but I was not above ripping his head off if he got in my way to see her.

"No," Edward said as he stepped closer towards me.

"Get. Away. From. Me." I was starting to tremble.

"See, you have no control." Edward gestured towards my shaking body. "You'll hurt her."

I laughed out loud. "I'll hurt her?" I said as I imagined the night I first picked Bella up, his face crumpled up in pain. "No one could ever hurt her as much as you already have." He was silent. "Now, get out of my way."

"No," Edward said as he went to grab my arm.

"Don't touch me!" I said as my entire body started to tremble harder, I couldn't help it, I was phasing, and I didn't care. I couldn't wait to sink my teeth into his lifeless body.


	14. It's All True

**~Happy Holidays and happy reading!~**

**It's All True**

**~Edward~**

I could see that Jacob was losing control, and he was about to phase here –right on Bella's front lawn. I had to make a quick decision, one that went against my better judgment.

I only had two options, one, attempt to keep Jacob away from Bella physically, risking letting Bella not only see me, but see a giant werewolf. Or option two, let Jacob see Bella and wait in the shadows, ready to step in if things get too dangerous. I sighed and let go of Jacob's arm.

"I'm going to kill you!" Jacob yelled through trembling teeth. I stepped backwards quickly around the side of the house. I could hear Bella walking towards her front window.

"Where are you going? Bloodsuc-" Jacob started yelling at me, but Bella's beautiful voice cut him off.

"Jacob?" Bella sounded surprised, "What the hell are you doing? Who are you talking to?"

"No one, just trying to get your attention." Jacob lied.

"Well, you got it, and I wouldn't be surprised if your screaming woke Charlie either."

"Get out of the way," Jacob started, "I'm coming up." As Jacob said that he looked back at me and grinned. I suppressed a growl.

"I thought you didn't want to be friends?" Bella said as she moved away from her window. "I hope you break your neck."

After shooting me one more antagonizing look, Jacob quickly climbed the tree in front of Bella's window and hopped into her room. He was surprisingly quiet, even for a werewolf. He shut the window behind him.

**~Bella~**

"What do you want?" I said flatly to the half naked Jacob standing in front of me.

"I want to say sorry, for being such a dick before." Jacob said, he sounded mostly sincere.

"Whatever."

"C'mon Bells, please, won't you forgive me?" Jacob said as he took a step closer to me.

"I don't understand you." Didn't Jacob just tell me that he didn't want to be my friend? To, _take a hint? _

"Ok, something happened to me last week, and it's still happening, and it's a forever thing." Jacob was struggling to find the right words, words that didn't make any sense to me.

"Are you referring to when you left me stranded in the woods?" I stared at him with accusing eyes.

"You weren't alone," Jacob muttered and looked away. So he must have seen Laurent, or Emmet and Jasper. I didn't know if I was allowed to elaborate, so I opted to play stupid.

"What are you talking about?" I said as I raised one eyebrow. Jacob rolled his eyes.

"Listen, I'm just going to be honest about this, not that _you_ ever were." I felt my heart skip a beat. Billy must have finally convinced him.

I kept my lie up, "Honest about what?"

"I know that they are vampires."

"Who's _they_?" I said, my voice shaky now.

"The _Cullen's_"

I just stared back at him.

"Anyway," Jacob said as he shook his head, "I have a secret I can't share with you, kind of like the secret you're not allowed to share..." Jacob looked at me intensely and whispered, "but worse."

"Well, I can keep a secret." I said with a smile, not quite admitting I knew about the Cullen's.

"Oh, I know that." Jacob laughed. "I would tell you if I could, but, I can't. Like literally, I can't." Jacob said with a loud sigh and flopped on my bed. I sat beside him confused. What could be a bigger secret than the one I was keeping?

"Can I have a hint?"

Jacob sat up suddenly, "The thing is Bella, I've already told you! Last year, on the beach," he looked like he wanted to go on, but stopped and shook his head again.

"The beach?" I tried to think back, I knew the night he was referring to. It was the night he told me about the legends, about what Edward really was. "I remember you telling me some scary stories about the Cullen's." I said as I looked away.

Jacob jumped off of my bed, now excited. "Yes! Bella, you remember!"

"Yes, of course I do." How could I forget?

"Right," Jacob snorted, "of course." We looked at each other for a minute before Jacob continued. "Do you remember anything other than what I told you about them?"

"Yeah, I remember you said that you were like a descendant from wolves or something. You said that my people would call them werewolves." I didn't know if I got that right, but the look on Jacob's face assured me I was. "I also remember that you said it was a load of bull, I remember you didn't believe any of the stories." His excitement vanished, and I could tell he no longer believed the legends of his tribe were untrue.

"_All_ the stories are true?" I asked, eyes wide.

"Yes, not just the one about the Cullen's. It's all true, all of the stories."

"So, you're a –" I couldn't believe what I was saying. "werewolf."

Jacob nodded his head, "Surprise." He said glumly.

"Have you always been one?" I said, still stunned. Does this mean that unicorns, dragons and mermaids existed too? Are all my friends creatures of make-believe?

Jacob cut my train of thought off, "No, I haven't. When we were in the woods last week, when I didn't feel well, well that's when it all started. That's why I couldn't see you; it's really dangerous for me to be around you."

"I've heard that before." I said looking down. "So, so is this when you tell me this is the last time I'll ever see you?" I was shouting now.

Jacob hugged me tightly and wiped the tears from my cheeks. "I would never say that to you," I pulled away from him, raising one eyebrow. "Well okay I kind of did today but I'm sorry! That's why I came back, to apologize." Jacob smiled. "I'm really _really_ sorry Bells. I was an idiot, please forgive me, you don't deserve to be talked to like that… you're my best friend. Anyone who says such things deserves to burn in hell." Jacob said the last few words louder than the rest.

"I don't think so," I said as I squeezed him harder. "But, you _are_ burning up Jake, what gives?" His skin felt like it was boiling.

"It's a wolf thing," Jacob said with a huge smile.

"Oh, cool." I didn't know what else to say. "So, how does it work, if you don't mind me asking."

"Magic," Jacob said with wide eyes and then started laughing. "Okay, but seriously, I'm not sure. It's just like I think of phasing into a wolf, and I do it. Really quickly too, the rest of the guys aren't as fast as me and I've only been a werewolf for a week." He seemed pretty proud of this fact.

"So, why is it dangerous?"

"Like I said I can phase quickly, and if you're standing too close, you could get hurt, or worse." He said very seriously. "If I get upset, I get an urge to phase, and it is difficult to control, especially at first." Jacob grabbed my hand. "But, Bella, I promise I will never hurt you."

"I believe you." I said as I squeezed his huge hand.

I suddenly thought of Laurent. "Did you happen to see… a certain vampire in the woods…" I wasn't sure how much I was allowed to say, but if he already knew, then what was the difference?

"No, I didn't see him for myself." Jacob started, "But I've seen him in the thoughts of my wolf brothers." I stared back at him with a dumb look. "Wolf thing." He said again.

"When any wolf is in wolf form he can see the thoughts of the others that are in wolf form. Every thought you have is laid out for everyone to see." He was frowning now.

"I'm guessing you're not a fan of _that_ wolf thing?"

"Not at all," Jacob said with a snort. "But it is useful, while hunting vampires."

My heart skipped a beat. I remembered Alice and the other Cullen's that were currently in Forks.

"Don't worry Bella, we have a treaty with the Cullen's, remember?"

"Oh," I said relieved as I remembered what he had told me on the beach. "right."

"We only hunt bad vampires, like the certain one you were just speaking of."

"Laurent."

"Whatever his name is, he's dead now because of the wolf pack."

"What?" I thought Alice said Emmett and Jasper killed him? "I was told-" I started but Jacob cut me off.

"Sorry, yeah, I forgot I wasn't supposed to tell you. But um yeah, those two other Cullen's helped out too."

"Oh okay, Alice never mentioned that." As soon as I said her name his fists tightened and he closed his eyes. "What's wrong?"

"Sorry, it's that, well, I know they are supposed to be good, but they are still my mortal enemies Bella. I still hate them."

I didn't know what to say. I wanted to defend Alice and the rest of them, but I could tell it would be a lost cause.

"Anyway, I gotta get going. I'm not supposed to talk to you. Sam's going to be pissed." Jacob smiled and shrugged. "Whatever, you're more important than any of them."

"Don't get in crap over me Jake."

He shook his head. "Don't worry. I'll call you soon, we can hang out okay?"

"Sounds good," I said as we both stood up from my bed. Jacob started walking towards the window. "Um, you can use the door..." I suggested.

"I'd rather not," Jacob said as he hugged me and jumped out of my bedroom into the darkness.

"Night Jake," I called out my window. Wow, what a night. So my best friend is a werewolf? Don't think I'll be getting much sleep tonight.

**~Edward~**

I could hear everything Jacob and Bella were saying. I really couldn't believe Jacob told Bella everything, well almost everything. He didn't mention me, thankfully. But that was only because he wanted Bella so badly. He wanted to bend down on one knee and ask her to marry him. He was so helplessly in love with her, I almost couldn't bare it.

He jumped down from Bella's room and walked right over to me, smiling the whole way. He was remembering hugging Bella, holding her hand. The smell of her hair, the colour of her eyes; things I haven't forgotten for a second.

"You are such a fucking _coward_." Jacob said the last word slowly. I couldn't disagree with him, so I changed the subject.

"If you really cared about Bella, you would stay away from her, for her own safety." I said calmly back.

"What?" Jacob laughed loudly, "Are you serious?"

"Yes." I said quite seriously, although I was beginning to see Jacob's point of view.

"I would never _ever_ hurt Bella." He said confidently.

"Not on purpose," I corrected.

"Stop acting like you know me you filthy fucking leech. I'm nothing like you. Maybe _you_ would hurt Bella, but, I'm _not_ you, and you should go back to where ever the fuck you were. Bella doesn't need you, you destroyed her, and she'll never take you back." I could see in Jacob's thoughts that he really didn't believe his last comment, but he also hoped that one day it would be true.

"I'm not going anywhere as long as she is in danger."

"Whatever, just sit in the shadows and watch me take your girl." Jacob was smiling from ear to ear, hoping I would hit him so he could attack me. Although I appeared calm on the outside, I really did want to rip his throat open.

"All right then," Jacob said with mock enthusiasm. "Nice talking to you, but I've got to go. Have fun sitting out here alone." He laughed all the way to his truck and I glared at him until he was out of my sight.

Bella's bedroom light was off now, I wondered if she was asleep yet. I didn't know why, or what changed my mind, but I had to talk to her, to tell her the truth. If she hated me or didn't want to see me, then so be it –it's what I truly deserved. But I missed her, _my_ Bella. I wanted her in my arms, not his.

And even though I was afraid of what she might say, I knew it couldn't wait any longer. I had reached my breaking point; I had had enough. I climbed up to her room the same way Jacob had. I sat silently on the window ledge for a few seconds, looking at Bella, who was lying down, facing the opposite way. I took a deep breath as I stepped onto her bedroom floor.


	15. You Were Meant For Me

**Hello all, this will be the final chapter to _When Forever Ends_. I didn't originally want to end the story like this, but I've been really busy lately and can't commit to writing as much as I have in the past. I know how annoying it can be to wait for new chapters, so I decided to end it here. In the future I might add to this story, or create a totally new one. Thanks to everyone who read and made nice comments throughout the life of _When Forever Ends_.**

-erica

xo

**You Were Meant For Me**

**~Edward~**

I could hear the perfect rhythm of Bella's heart, I could hear her quietly breathing in and out. I couldn't be sure, since I couldn't read her mind, but I was almost positive she was sleeping.

I hated to wake her because I knew she had been severely sleep deprived for the last –well since I left in September. Although she wasn't talking yet, I was sure she was asleep. I knelt beside her bed, facing her. Contemplating what I was going to say, and even wondering if this was what was best for her. I had never before been so nervous in my long life.

"Um, Edward?" I heard a high pitched voice call from the window.

"What are you doing here Alice?" I hissed quietly to my annoying sister.

"Well… I had a vision." Alice said, squinting her eyes at me.

I sighed, and crossed the room so that I stood in front of Alice. "I have decided that I'm going to tell her that I'm here."

_Why? _Alice thought, still staring at me with squinted eyes.

"Because I'm tired of being miserable. I'm tired of pretending like," I paused and looked over my shoulder to my sleeping beauty. "Like we're not meant to be together." Alice nodded in agreement.

"Okay, I just wanted to make sure you really wanted to do this. I'm going to go back to the house." Alice said as she jumped gracefully down from Bella's window.

"Thanks, Alice." I whispered into the darkness.

_You're welcome. _

I crossed the room and took the same position beside Bella's bed as I had before the interruption. I felt better though, more relieved. Talking with Alice confirmed to me that I _was_ doing the right thing. That this _was_ what I should've done a _long_ time ago. But I still thought it was a shame to wake her. I had a smile on my face as I gazed at her beautiful features, considering my options.

As I was staring at her closed eye lids, they suddenly flew open, and her chocolate brown eyes looked straight back at me. I was at a loss for words, her eyes were beyond stunning, I opened my mouth to speak but I stopped when Bella flung her arms around my neck, she didn't say anything either, she just squeezed me tightly; but of course I wished she would squeeze harder. I quickly scooped her up and sat her on my lap on the floor so I could feel her whole body around mine. We sat quietly, blissfully in each others arms for a few minutes, until I finally found my voice.

"Bella," I whispered into her ear as I rubbed her back, "I'm so sorry sweetheart, please will you forgive me for the pain I've caused you?"

Bella loosened her hold on my neck, not completely, but so she could look up at my face. Her eyes and cheeks were wet and that made me feel awful. I had caused her so much pain. I brought my hand up to her beautiful face and wiped the tears away, for the last time I vowed to myself.

"Edward," Bella quietly whispered to me, "Edward," she said again, this time with a hint of a smile. "You came back!"

"I missed you too much Bella. I had to come back; you were on my mind every millisecond of every day. It was complete and utter torture being without you Bella Swan."

"Oh," Bella said, her smile had gone away –she didn't look convinced.

"Bella, what is it? Have you gotten over me? If you have that is more than fair, it's for the best actually…" I trailed off as a feeling of rejection washed over me. Did I actually think that Bella would just forgive me and forget everything? I had put her through Hell, and she now had Jacob. "I can leave–"

"No! Don't go!" Bella yelled and resumed her choke hold on me.

"What's wrong Bella?" I whispered into her long brown hair.

"You left, it was so easy for you to just go… you didn't even say good bye…" I could smell more salty tears fall from her eyes, and I mentally cursed myself.

"It was _not_ easy, the only way I was able to do it was because I told myself that it was the best way for you. I thought that if you stayed around me any longer you would just end up getting hurt over and over." Bella was shaking her head as I spoke the words. "Yes, I know _now_ that it was not the best idea. But please, trust me when I say this, I never fell out of love with you, quite the opposite. After being without you has shown me how much I love you Bella, you are everything to me. You were meant for me and I don't want it any other way; I just want to be with you always; forever. I want you, all of you, and it won't be easy but…" I trailed off as I realized just how hard it would be. It took a fair amount of self control just to sit with her now; the sweet smell of her blood was so unbelievably attractive.

"But it is worth the struggle." Bella said quietly.

"Yes, it is worth everything."

Bella released her hold slightly, and sat up on my thigh, so that our heads were almost on the same level. She had a huge smile on her face, it was very contagious. She took her hand and gently traced the outside of my lips. The feeling was electrifying; her finger was soft and hot on my hard parted lips. Her scent was flooding my mouth, it burned my throat, but I knew I would and _could_ control myself now. I was tempted by her blood still, but I had a new hold on it.

"I love you." Bella whispered as she was caressing my jaw now. I didn't have enough patience to merely voice my feelings about her; I gently grabbed her head with both of my hands and guided her lips towards mine.

When they met it felt like I had been shocked with a million volts. I immediately heard the familiar sound of Bella's heart speed up; this drove me wild. Our lips were hungry for each others. Bella was breathing quick and loud, kissing my lips with a larger intensity than before I left. Careful not to hurt her, I scooped her up in my arms again, supporting her head and back easily. While kissing her eagerly still, I delicately laid her on the bed.

I was on top of her now, kissing her throat. I could feel the blood rushing through her veins with my lips. She had her hands matted in my hair, and her legs wrapped tightly around my waist. "Bella, my love." I whispered softly as I nibbled on her right ear. This must have sent her over the edge, because she pushed on my chest with her hands, signaling for me to get off of her. I laid on my back beside her, while she climbed on top of me and straddled my waist. She started off by kissing me fast on the lips and then slowly going down my throat, all the while unbuttoning my shirt. Once her task was complete, she started kissing down my bare chest.

"Bella," I gasped, "Bella, we can't –" I broke off mid-sentence. I knew that I was _supposed_ to be the one with stellar self control, but it was extremely hard with this gorgeous woman on top of me.

I could feel her smile while she kissed right above the waistband of my jeans. I couldn't finish my sentence, I really didn't want her to stop…

As she kissed, Bella traced her right pointer finger on my stomach, just above the top of my jeans, and suddenly pulled them down an inch. I knew in that instant that if I didn't stop it now, I wouldn't be able to. With one quick movement I sat up, while picking up Bella by the waist and sitting her on my lap, facing me. She frowned.

"What's wrong?" I asked in a teasing voice.

"Well, nothing, actually." Bella smiled. "I was just having fun, a lot more than you _usually_ allow."

I nodded, and brought my lips to hers again; _I _wasn't done. While I supported her weight with my hands and arms, I lifted her up and leaned her backward, arching her back so her chest was only inches from my face. Her breathing kicked up at once, I smiled.

I pulled my lips away from hers and kissed down her pulsing throat, down her smooth collar bone, and down the middle of her chest. She was conveniently wearing a lose-fitting v-neck tank top to bed. I let my lips wander and felt Bella tremble in my arms. Although I wanted to take things further, I decided that we shouldn't push it; we'd have lots of time to practice. So with my teeth I lifted her tank top back into place and laid her back on the bed. This time with me laying _beside_ her.

Bella stayed laying there, staring wide-eyed at the ceiling breathing nosily. "Wow." Bella said as she turned her head towards me and smiled.

"Oh, I love you too." I decided to add in, incase she hadn't gotten the hint. She giggled. "Okay, it's pretty late sweetie, I think you should try to get some sleep."

"Are you serious!" She turned her body towards me, and had a pleading look on her face that was adorable.

"Yes, but don't worry, we can continue tomorrow after you've gotten some rest." I said as I grabbed her blankets and tucked her in. I stayed on top of the covers so she didn't get the chills.

"Okay, I guess that's okay." She yawned. "I am kinda tired."

"Sleep well Bella, I love you so much." I said as I wrapped my arms around her.

"Love you too." Bella said quietly. I hummed her lullaby until she fell asleep.

**~Bella~**

I was standing in the vast empty field, my feet frozen once again. It felt like I had been here for years. I tried to move like I always did, but I wasn't surprised when I couldn't. I opened my mouth to call out for help, but nothing came out.

Then I heard his velvet voice in the distance, it was different than before though. His voice was louder and clearer. He called for me to come to him. Even though I knew it would be a lost cause, I tried again to move my legs. I was surprised when I was able to. I wasted no time and started running.

His voice was getting louder, which meant that I was getting closer to him. As I approached the familiar forest I could see something glorious standing under a tree. "Edward!" I was able to call, my voice as strong as ever. "Edward! Please don't leave!" I yelled out, still running at full speed towards him.

In the next second Edward was standing in front of me. I stood on my toes and kissed his flawless lips. I asked him to never leave me again, and he agreed.

I realized I was dreaming when I felt something cool on my face. I opened my eyes and seen Edward's face a few inches from mine. He had a worried expression on his face. "What's wrong?" I asked anxiously.

"You kept yelling out 'don't leave', I'm just, so, _so_ sorry Bella."

"Oh, don't worry, it was a good dream." I said with a smile.

"Well that's great news. Hopefully they will continue to be." Edward was still stroking my face.

I nodded in agreement as I remembered what Edward had promised last night. "So, I'm well rested…" I said as I kissed Edward on the lips. He chuckled, and to my disappointment gently pulled away.

"Your stomach was also yelling out while you were asleep." Edward said with a grin.

"I'm not hungry." I said just as my stomach decided to gurgle. Traitor.

"We'll have lots of time to fool around after you eat, Charlie left to go fishing a couple of hours ago with Billy."

"Oh really? He must be feeling better today. That's good." I could tell that Edward didn't understand, so I answered his silent question. "Yesterday he had to cancel fishing because he got really sick. But it must have only been a 24-hour bug." I swung my legs to the side of my bed and stood up and stretched.

"Let me help you, darling." I heard Edward say from behind me. He picked me up into his arms. "Where to? Kitchen or bathroom?" he said with a smile, he was beaming.

"Bathroom, please."

"You got it!"

Edward dropped me off at the bathroom and told me he was going to go prepare a special meal for me in the kitchen. How did I get so lucky all of a sudden? After I finished up in the bathroom, I started down the stairs. When I reached the bottom I heard a loud knock at the front door.

I opened the door and had to squint my eyes, it was unusually sunny out.

"Hi, Bella!" Jacob's voice shouted.

"Hey, Jake." I said with a surprised smile. "What are you doing here?"

"Ouch!" Jacob said, while pouting his lower lip.

"No I didn't mean it like that," I said as I pushed him playfully. "I just wasn't expecting any werewolves at my door this morning."

"Haha, well I thought I'd come over and cook you some eggs or something. I was bored, Billy went out with Charlie, and I figured you'd be bored too. We could even go hiking again or something. I won't leave you this time though, don't worry." Jacob finished with a friendly wink.

"Actually, I have someone already cooking for me today." I said nervously. I didn't want to lie to Jacob, but I also didn't want to make him mad. I recalled Jacob referring to the Cullen's as his _mortal enemies_ last night. I wondered if I could politely say no to his offer and decide how to tell him about Edward at a later date.

"Yeah, there is an unusual amount of stink coming out of your house this morning. Jacob said as he tried to peer around the door. "Who is it? Alice?"

"Um, no, but hey I'll talk to you about it later k? I'll call you and we can hang out sometime this week." I said with a smile, trying to slowly close the door. But Jacob wasn't having any of that, he pushed the door and it swung wide open, hitting the inside wall with a _thud_. Edward was at my side then, smiling at Jacob.

"Good morning Jacob." Edward said politely. I looked over at Jacob, he wasn't smiling back.

"What the hell are you doing here?" Jacob shouted at Edward, taking a step forward.

"Just making breakfast for Bella." Edward responded as he pulled my waist closer to his side. "Would you like to stay and eat?"

"I'd rather eat shit."

"Jacob!" I yelled, "Edward is trying to be nice, maybe you could try it for once."

"What?!" Jacob looked at me as if I was missing something. He looked back to Edward with gritted teeth.

"So, what? You just took him back? Just like that? Don't you remember how much he hurt you?" Jacob was shouting at me, although he was only standing a few feet away.

"Maybe you should calm down." Edward had dropped the smile. "You wouldn't want to do something you'd instantly regret."

"Yes, we are back together," I interrupted the intense stare-down they were involved in. "And I hope you can be happy for me."

"Wow." Jacob said as he took a few steps back.

"I know things are complicated now that you're a… wolf…" I started. "I know that you think you hate Edward, but maybe you could forget the whole mortal enemies thing, and we can all be friends."

"Yeah, Jacob." Edward said in agreement with my proposal.

"FUCK YOU!!" Jacob screamed at Edward, so loud it actually scared me.

"If you can't be nice, then maybe you should leave." I said angrily.

"Okay, have a nice life Bella." Jacob said sarcastically as he turned and quickly walked away from me. I went to go after him, but Edward kept his hold on my waist.

"Just give him a chance to calm down." Edward suggested. "Call him later, maybe he will be in a better mood." I nodded. Jacob did warn me it was dangerous to be around him if he was angry.

Jacob was out of sight now, so I decided to close the door. I couldn't understand why he was so mad. I just stood in the hallway; I could feel the tears coming.

"Don't worry Bella," Edward hugged me, "I'm sure he didn't mean what he said."

I shrugged.

"He cares a lot about you, I can tell. He will get over us being back together, and I'm very sure that you two can become friends again."

"I hope so." I said as I squeezed Edward tightly back.

"Hungry?" Edward asked as he sat me down in a kitchen chair. There was a steaming pile of scrambled eggs, French toast, bacon and a wide assortment of fruit in front of me.

"Yes! Thanks!" I tried to push Jacob's pained face out of my head as I ate the delicious meal Edward had prepared just for me.

"Oh," Edward said from behind me, he was giving me a message while I ate. "I called Carlisle, we are officially residents of Forks again. I start school with you tomorrow."

"Really?" I screeched as I stood up and hugged him.

"You bet! Now sit back down, I wasn't finished with your massage."

"Can we continue with it upstairs?" I said as I bit my lip.

And before I could blink I was on my bed again, with Edward's beautiful body on top of mine. I was now able to completely forget that Jacob even existed, that anyone did except for Edward.

As Edward's strong hand caressed my left thigh, I couldn't believe it. I couldn't believe this amazing creature wanted me. I was never really sure before to what extent he loved me –if maybe I only entertained him, or if he felt the same strong feelings for me that I felt for him. I now had my answer: he loved me _just_ as much, I was sure of it. I knew that he really wouldn't ever leave me again.

I gasped loudly as his thumb found the warmest spot between my thighs. He was kissing me as passionately as last night and I never wanted it to stop. "Please, Edward," I gasped when his lips started kissing behind my ear. "Please, don't stop…" I heard him chuckle softly, and then felt his blissful response.

"I love you, my Bella." Edward whispered, now staring into my eyes.

"I love you too." I simply responded. "Forever."

"Forever." He agreed.


	16. When Forever Ends Playlist

**When Forever Ends Play List**

Hey everyone, I always like reading author's play lists for their stories.

Here is my _very_ eclectic play list! Haha let me know if any other songs come to mind.

***Bella***

Maps – Yeah Yeah Yeahs

Don't Dream It's Over – Crowded House

Long December – The Counting Crows

Wish You Were Here – Pink Floyd

You Could Be Happy – Snow Patrol

Gone Away – The Offspring

Ever So Sweet – The Early November

No Air – Glee Cast (Also like the Jordin Sparks original)

Breathe Me – Sia

Help! I'm Alive – Metric

Killing Me Softly – Lauren Hill

Possibility – Lykke Li

Satellite Heart – Anya Marina

Stairway To Heaven – Led Zeppelin

Heaven Can Wait – Meat Loaf

True Colors – Glee Cast (I love the original Cyndi Lauper version too!)

Heaven – Bryan Adams (Also like the DJ Sammy cover)

Maybe I'm Amazed – Jem (Also love the original Paul McCartney version)

***Jacob***

Swing Life Away (Acoustic) – Rise Against

My Never – Blue October

Don't Look Back In Anger – Oasis

Creep – Radiohead

Chasing Pavements – Adele

Wrong – Depeche Mode

Trailer Trash – Modest Mouse

Running Up That Hill – Placebo

***Edward***

Nothing Man – Pearl Jam

Trip – Hedley

For The Nights I Can't Remember – Hedley

Gunnin' – Hedley

The Tide – The Spill Canvas

I'll Catch You – The Get Up Kids

For Crying Out Loud – Meat Loaf

Emily – From First To Last

There Is – Boxcar Racer

Just Breathe – Pearl Jam

With You – The Stills

Everlong – Foo Fighters

Porno Star Trek – USS.

Echo – Incubus

Walk On The Ocean – John Mayer

Whenever I'm Alone With You – The Cure

Closer – Nine Inch Nails (Jacob _wishes_ this was his song!! hahaha)

I Could Die For You – Red Hot Chili Peppers

Forever Young – Youth Group (Also love the Bob Dylan original)


End file.
